Lord of my Dance

A Bookmark, Baubles and a Letter...

2006-12-08T22:48:00.000-08:00

Ho! Ho! Ho! It’s my favourite time of the year again, where my heart just skips a beat just seeing the shiny baubles dangling from the ceiling and a romantic fireplace decorating the walls. I was walking through Metrojaya the other day over at Mid Valley and their deco was just out of this world. It was like walking into some kind of “Winter Wonderland”…Mmmmm… I felt like a small kid getting excited at the prospect of exploring my first steps in that magical ambience…was sure I even skipped a little!

Ok…back to earth already! With the new semester looming ahead and the frazzled busyness of constant ringing of phones and tight schedules, Christmas preparations and practices, my head is just spinning trying to gather my thoughts all at once. There is this saying that BUSY = Busy Under Satan’s Yoke. I think there is a certain truth to it. How many times have we been a victim of “Tyranny of the Urgent” where because of our busyness, we push aside the important things in favour of the urgent.

When Ps. Sandra preached last Sunday about evaluating and reflecting on our live in 2006, and to prepare ourselves for a great 2007, it was a timely reminder. And to really rub it in, I received a letter from the e06 conference a few days later. Inside was a Christmas e06 bookmark from Ps. Lee Choo with the main verse of John 10:10 of which the conference was based on. Together with it also was the letter I wrote to God during the e06 closing which I mentioned in my last post.

When I started to read back on what I wrote, I started crying…it’s all coming back to me now…

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank you for giving me the opportunity to attend this conference. Many times I was tempted to pull out because it was too expensive, too inconvenient, too this and too that. But You have been faithful and provided for me every step of the way. You knew I needed to be here because I needed to stop and reflect on my life. My struggles were just signs telling me that there are deeper issues that I needed to struggle with.

I needed restoration and forgiveness for not being true to You and to myself. Sometimes I feel that I am short changing myself because I was just too lazy to ‘trouble’ myself to change. Heal me from my hurts and bitterness from the people who have hurt me, whether it was done on purpose or not. You will turn these hurts for my good because Your plans for me are not to harm me but to heal me and give me an abundant life. To turn my struggles into stepping stones that will help me achieve the dreams that You have planned for me. To use my passions and gifts to impact the world around me. Help me to respect each one’s personhood. To know and see each human being with Your eyes and Your love. That they are not inconveniences and stumbling blocks in my path but that they are lessons and gifts from You as I journey through this life. Let me experience fully each challenge or joy that comes my way. To embrace each pain or joy that You give me as a tool to make me whole again.

Daddy, help me to have a magnified perspective of you. To really know just what a Great and Mighty God You are. To know not just in my head but also in my heart that You truly love me despite of what I do or who I am. Help me to surrender my will and the urge to control my life and to give it to You willingly. To live a life of obedience and integrity that will reflect Your character. Whenever I serve You, I want to serve you in order to participate in Your work and not because I want to earn Your love and approval or because that’s what a Christian is supposed to do. Thank You so much Daddy! I love You.

Somehow, the busyness crept up on me and I seem to have forgotten the things were important. I’ve somehow left a crack unattended for the thief to put his foot in to destroy little by little, bits of my life. It’s a good time for me to stop now and reflect again…

Between the Devil and the...Angel?

2006-11-30T00:32:00.000-08:00

And finally the final book of the trilogy, “The Devil and Miss Prym” is the most interesting of all. In this novel about temptation is a thought provoking parable of a community devoured by greed, cowardice and fear as it struggles with the choice between good and evil.

A stranger arrives at the remote village of Viscos, carrying with him a backpack containing a notebook and eleven gold bars. He comes searching for the answer to a question that torments him. Are human beings, in essence good or evil? In his sophisticated plot, he shows Chantal Prym, a young, simple girl in the village, where he buried his eleven bars of gold. After showing her the gold bars, he shared his plot to proof his theory that the nature of human beings when confronted with temptation, will always fall.

He explained to Chantal, “Everybody in this village is honest, starting with you. I showed you the gold bar, which would give you the necessary financial independence to get out of the village, to travel the world. The gold is going to stay there; you know it’s mine but you could steal it if you wanted. And then you would be breaking one of the commandments: ‘Thou shalt not steal'.

“As for the ten gold bars, they are worth enough to mean that none of the villagers need to work again. I didn’t ask you to rebury the gold bars because I am going to move them to a place only I will know about. When you go back to the village, I want you to say that you saw them and that I am willing to hand them over to the villagers on condition that they do something they would never dream of doing. To break the commandment ‘Thou shalt not kill'.

“I’m giving them a week. If at the end of the seven days, someone in the village is found dead, then the money will go to the villagers, and I will conclude that we are all evil. If you steal the gold bar but the village resists the temptation, or vice versa, I will conclude that there are good people and evil people – which puts me in a difficult position because it would mean that there’s a spiritual struggle going on that could be won by either side.”

For five days, Chantal struggled whether to present the crazy plot to the villagers or to steal the gold bar and run away from the village. There was once she got so close as to dig out the buried gold bar and as she stared at the gold bar, contemplating whether to take it. Then she discovered that she couldn’t go through with it; this inability, however, had nothing to do with honesty or dishonesty, but with sheer terror she was feeling. She had just realized there were two things that prevent us from achieving our dreams: believing them to be impossible or seeing those dreams made possible by some sudden turn of the wheel of fortune, when you least expected it. For at that moment, all our fears suddenly surface: the fear of setting off along a road heading who knows where, the fear of a life full of new challenges, the fear of losing forever everything that is familiar. People want to change everything and, at the same time want it all to remain the same.

Finally the villagers were presented with the tempting offer and they decided to take the bait and get rid of the old widow who could see and speak to spirits. And as we see the battle between the devil and the angel of Chantal and the stranger, Chantal finally takes control and tries to convince the villagers why they should not commit this atrocious act. Did she succeed? Well…read the book to find out!

This story reminds me so much of the “Screwtape Letters” by C.S.Lewis where we could see how the battle with the unseen world of spirits can affect our lives. And I liked the short story which was told at the end to kinda “sum things up”. This story was about a saint and a sinner. The saint wanted to spend the night at the sinner’s place knowing full well that the sinner has planned to murder him while he sleeps in the middle of the night. But before they went to sleep, the two of them talked together for awhile. The sinner decided to challenge the saint with 3 questions:

1. If tonight, the most beautiful prostitute in the village came in here, would you be able to see her as neither beautiful or seductive?
2. If I offered you a pile of gold coins to leave your home in the mountain and come and join us, would you be able to look at that gold and see only pebbles?
3. If you were sought by two brothers, one of whom hated you, and the other who saw you as a saint, would you be able to feel the same towards them both?
To all the 3 questions, this was what the saint answered: “ No, it would be very hard but I would be able to control myself.”

The moral of the story? Both the saint and the sinner had the same instincts-Good and Evil struggled in both of them, just as they did in every soul on earth. When the sinner realized that the saint was the same as he, the sinner realized too that he was the same as the saint. It was all a matter of control. And choice. God gave us all a free will. A choice to do good or to do bad. Use it wisely…but the best thing is God gives us grace. In the song below by Steven Curtis Chapman, it talks about the privilege we humans have to have experienced the "grace of God and the redemption of sin” that angels only wish they knew.

Angels Wish
~ 1 Peter 1: 12 ~

Was God smiling
When He spoke the words
That made the world
And did He cry about the flood
What does God’s voice sound like
When He sings, when He’s angry
These are just a few things
That the angels have on me

Well, I can’t fly
At least not yet
I’ve got no halo on my head
And I can’t even start to picture Heaven’s beauty
But I’ve been shown the Saviour’s love
The grace of God has raised me up
To show me things the angels long to look into
And I know things
The angels only wish they knew

I have seen the dark and desperate place
Where sin will take you
I’ve felt loneliness and shame
And I have watched the blinding light of grace
Come breaking through with a sweetness
Only tasted by the forgiven and redeemed
And someday I’ll sit down with my angel friends
Up in Heaven
They’ll tell me about creation
And I’ll tell them a story of grace

Death by Suicide

2006-11-28T08:08:00.000-08:00

“I’m alive”, thought Veronika. “Everything’s gonna start all over again. I’ll have to stay in here for a while, until they realize that I’m perfectly normal. Then they’ll let me out, and I’ll see the outside world again.”

In the second book by Paulo Coelho I have been exploring, “Veronika Decides To Die” talks about a 24 year old Veronika who seems to have everything – youth and beauty, boyfriends and a loving family, a fulfilling job. But something is missing in her life. So, one cold November morning, Veronika decides to die. She takes a handful of sleeping pills, expecting never to wake up again. But she does…in a mental hospital where she is told that she has only days to live.

And as she thinks about her situation now that her suicide was unsuccessful, an inner monologue continues on in her head:

“Since people always tend to help others-just so that they can feel they are better then they really are-they’ll give me my job back at the library.

Since I only take sleeping pills, I’m not disfigured in any way: I’m still young, pretty, intelligent, I won’t have difficulty getting boyfriends. I’ll make love with them and I’ll feel a certain degree of pleasure, but the moment I reach orgasm, the feeling of emptiness will return. We won’t have much to talk about, and both he and I will know it. The time will come to make our excuses-“It’s late” or “I have to get up early tomorrow” – and we’ll part as quickly as possible, avoiding looking each other in the eye.

I’ll go back to my rented room, read a book, turn on the TV to see the same old programs, set the alarm clock to wake up at exactly the same time I woke up the day before, and mechanically repeat my tasks at the library. I’ll eat a sandwich in the park opposite the theater, sitting on the same bench, along with other people who also choose the same benches on which to sit and have their lunch, people who all have the same vacant look but pretend to be pondering extremely important matters.

Then I’ll go back to work; listen to the gossip about who’s going out with whom, who’s suffering from what, how such and such a person was in tears about her husband, Then I’ll go back to the bars at the end of the day, and the whole thing will start again.

My mother who must be out of her mind with worry over my suicide attempt, will recover from the shock and will keep asking me what I’m going to do with my life, why I’m not the same as everyone else, things aren’t as complicated as I think they are. “Look at me, for example, I’ve been married to your father for years, and I’ve tried to give you the best possible upbringing and set you the best possible example.”

One day I’ll get tired of hearing her constantly repeating the same things, and to please her I’ll marry a man whom I oblige myself to love. He and I will end up finding a way of dreaming of a future together: a house in the country, children, our children’s future. We’ll make love often in the first year, less in the second, and after the third year, people perhaps think about sex only once every two weeks and transform that thought into action only once a month. Even worse, we’ll barely talk. I’ll force myself to accept the situation, and I’ll wonder what’s wrong with me, because he no longer takes any interest in me, ignores me, and does nothing but talk about his friends as if they were his real world.

When the marriage is just about to fall apart, I’ll get pregnant. We’ll have a child, feel closer to each other for a while, and then the situation will go back to what it was before.
I’ll begin to put on weight. And I’ll start to go on diets, systematically defeated each day, each week, by the weight that keeps creeping up regardless of the controls I put on it. At that point I’ll take those magic pills that stop you from feeling depressed; then I’ll have a few more children, conceived during nights of love that pass all too quickly. I’ll tell everyone that the children are my reason for living when in reality my life is their reason for living.

People will always consider us a happy couple, and no one will know how much loneliness, bitterness, and resignation lies beneath the surface happiness.

Until one day, when my husband takes a lover for the first time, and I will perhaps kick up a fuss and think of killing myself. By then, though, I’ll be too old and cowardly, with two or three children who need my help, and I’ll have to bring them up and help them find a place in the world before I can just abandon everything. I won’t commit suicide: I’ll make a scene; I’ll threaten to leave and take the children with me. Like all men, my husband will back down; he’ll tell me he loves me and that it won’t happen again. It won’t even occur to him that, if I really did decide to leave, my only option would be to go back to my parents’ house and stay there for the rest of my life, forced to listen to my mother going on and on all day about how I lost my one opportunity for being happy, that he was a wonderful husband despite his peccadilloes, that my children will be traumatized by the separation.

Two or three years later, another woman will appear in his life. I’ll find out – because I saw them or because someone told me- but this time I’ll pretend I don’t know. I used up all my energy fighting against that other lover; I’ve no energy left.

He will continue being a considerate husband. I will continue working at the library, eating my sandwiches in the square opposite the theater, reading books I never quite manage to finish, watching television programs that are the same as they were ten, twenty, fifty years ago. Except that I’ll eat my sandwiches with a sense of guilt because I’m getting fatter; and I won’t go to bars anymore because I have a husband expecting me to come home and look after the children.

After that it’s a matter of waiting for the children to grow up and of spending all day thinking about suicide, without the courage to do anything about it. One fine day I’ll reach the conclusion that that’s what life is like: There’s no point worrying about it; nothing will change."

For moment, it read like one of those Dear Thelma’s letter. A bitter, disillusioned woman who spent so much energy on trying to ensure that her life continued exactly as it always had. A woman who had given up many of her desires so that her parents would continue to love her as they had when she was a child, even though she knew that real love changes and grows with time and discovers new ways of expressing itself.

When she decides to get a job, she rejects a tempting but risky offer in favour of a job at a company, where you didn’t earn much money but was secure. She went to work every day, always keeping to the same timetable, always making sure she wasn’t perceived as a threat by her superiors; she was content; she didn’t struggle, and so she didn’t grow: The most important thing was that she gets her salary at the end of the month.

When she has achieved almost everything she wanted in life, she reaches the conclusion that her existence had no meaning, because every day was the same. And that’s when people start to die inside.

What would you change about your life if suddenly you found out that you had only days to live? Would you still continue to live exactly the same rountine as always? Or would you start to live your life to the fullest? When Veronika was faced with the only 24 hours more to live, she asked the doctor at the mental hospital for two favours:

First: For some medication or injection so that she can stay awake and enjoy every moment that remains of her life. She was very tired but didn’t want to sleep. She wanted to do a lot of things, things that she always postponed for some future date, in the days when she thought life would last forever. Things she’s lost interest in, when she started to believe that life wasn’t worth living.

Second: She wanted to leave the mental hospital so that she could die outside. She needed to visit places where it’s always been there but never had the curiosity to go and see it at close range. She needed to talk to the woman who sells chestnuts in winter and flowers in the spring. They passed each other so often, but never once spoke to each other. She wanted to walk in the snow without a jacket, to find out what extreme cold feels like, for she was always so well wrapped up, so afraid of catching a cold.

She wants to feel the rain on her face, to smile at any man she feel attracted to, to accept all the coffees men might buy for her. She wants to kiss her mother, tell her she loves her, weep in her lap, unashamed to show her feelings, because they were always there even though she hid them. She wanted to give herself to one man, to the city, to life and, finally, to death.

So do we only start living when death starts to stare us in the face? Or do we live our lives doing the things we’ve always been doing but never really lived at all? Well let me end this thought provoking post with a song by Steven Curtis Chapman:

Last day on earth
~Matthew 25:21; James 4:14~

I pull over on the side of the road and I
Watch the cars pass me by
The headlights and the black limousines tell me
Someone is saying goodbye
I bow my head and I whisper a prayer, “Father, comfort their broken hearts”
And as I drive away there’s a thought that I
I cannot escape, no I, cannot escape this thought
I can’t get away

Oh, if this should be my last day on this earth
How then shall I live
Oh, if this should be the last day that I have
Before the air of Heaven
Let me live it with abandon to
The only thing that remains
After the last day here on earth

If this should be my last day here on earth
If this should be my last day here on earth
If this should be my last, last day here on earth
And if tomorrow comes to find me
Looking in the face of Jesus
Will I hear Him say the words “Well done”?
If this should be my last day here on earth
If this should be my last, my last day here on earth
‘Cause this could be my last, this could be my last
This could be my last day

Between Love and God

2006-11-25T08:33:00.000-08:00

My book review journey continues…and this time it’s a book entitled, “By The River Piedra I Sat Down And Wept” This is the first part in Paulo Coelho's trilogy "On the Seventh Day". The other two parts are “Veronika Decides to Die” and “The Devil and Miss Prym”. This trilogy revolve around a week in the life of seemingly ordinary people, all of whom find themselves suddenly confronted by love, death and power. Linking these stories together is Coelho’s belief that the profoundest changes take place within a short time. And while these intense changes shape the lives and decisions of the characters, they also challenge the reader, testing our strength, courage and willingness to adapt. After all the challenge will not wait. Life does not look back. A week is more than enough time for us to decide whether or not to accept our destiny.

“By The River Piedra I Sat Down And Wept” is essentially a story about love. It also includes elements of Catholicism and particularly focuses on the female aspect of divinity.

The story focuses on two adolescent lovers who reunite after eleven years. Time has transformed Pilar into a strong and independent young woman but who is frustrated with the grind of university life and looking for greater meaning. Life has taught her to be strong and to hide her feelings. After eleven years she meets up with her childhood sweetheart, grown into a handsome spiritual teacher, with a reputation as a healer and miracle worker, who turned to religion as a refuge from his inner conflicts.

Together they take a journey that is initially fraught with difficulties as blame and resentment resurface after years of being hidden. But by the River Piedra, in a small village in the French Pyrenees, they find a way to discuss many of life’s big questions and re-evaluate their relationship.

One very funny thing I noticed was that the name of Pilar’s childhood sweetheart was never mentioned at all in the book. So for the sake of convenience, I shall refer to him as “The Seminarian”. Why? Apparently it was a major issue for their relationship because he had come to a point where he had to make a critical decision. He loved Pilar and would give up everything for her. If he chose to become a priest and continue his religious mission as a spiritual healer and miracle worker, he would have to give up Pilar. If he chose to stay with Pilar, he would have to give up his gift of healing, and his religious mission to continue to live his life with Pilar like every other person.

Finally The Seminarian decides….well if anyone plans on reading the book, to avoid spoiling the ending for you, I will not reveal his decision. But this story did raise one very good question. If I had to choose between God and the love of my life, which one would I choose? It reminds me of the life of Jim Elliot where he obeyed God’s call to do missions, leaving behind the love of his life, Elisabeth. But God finally reunited the two of them together and was married after many years but their marriage was short lived for Jim was killed while trying to bring the gospel to the Aucas.

Having to choose between the two people we love most isn’t an easy decision. I can still remember when I was a very young Christian, I had the burden to go for missions. But in the back of my mind, I wondered, what if I can’t find a life partner if I go for missions? What about my hopes and dreams of finding someone to share my life with and to start a home together? And as I wrestled with these questions, God spoke to me in John 21: 15-22. In the same way as Jesus asked Peter if he loved Him, God asked me if I love Him above all these. God knew my heart. So then, what is it to me whether I find my life partner or not? Just follow Him. After all, there is no better place on earth than to be in the will of God. There is this particular song by Steven Curtis Chapman (now you know who’s my favourite singer) that reflected how I felt at that time. The songs is entitled:

Believe Me Now
~Psalm 119:89-93; Isaiah 41:10; Romans 8:31-39; Hebrews 13:8~

I watch you looking out
Across the raging water
So sure your only hope
Lies on the other side
You hear the enemy
That’s closing in around you
And I know
That you don’t have the strength to fight
But you do
Have the faith to stand and…

Believe Me now
Believe Me here
Remember all the times I’ve told you loud and clear
I am with you and I am for you
So believe Me now
Believe Me now

I am the One who waved my hand
And split the ocean
I am the One who spoke the words
And raised the dead
And I’ve loved you long before
I set the world in motion
I know all the fears you’re feeling now
But do you remember who I am?
Do you…

So believe Me now
Believe it’s true
I never have, I never will abandon you
And the God that I have always been
I will forever be
So believe Me now

I am the God Who never wastes a single hurt
That you endure
My words are true
And all My promises are sure
So believe Me now
Oh, believe Me now

After my struggle with that question, I can still remember my brother, who believes himself an atheist, observed that my life seems to revolve around the Bible, church and mission trips. So one day he sarcastically said to me, “Maybe you should marry a pastor one day!” Although he said it to irritate me, I was like “What’s so bad about marrying a pastor?” Being a naïve and very young Christian, I thought marrying a pastor was like marrying the “perfect guy”. To me being a pastor = a man who loves God = a man who obeys God = someone who will love and be faithful to his wife.

Then when I grew a little older and a little wiser, I realized that pastors are human too and nobody’s perfect. They still get tempted, they still make mistakes. I also have the opportunity to see my ex-colleague get married to a pastor and shifted to Macao to pastor a church together. My ex-colleague and I are like total opposites in personality and when I saw her ministry and life as a pastor’s wife…I started to wonder, “Am I qualified to become a pastor’s wife?” To me being a pastor’s wife is like being the “The role model wife” aka “The Proverbs 31 woman”. If you ask me, I don’t think I’m near anywhere like her!!

And another thing I found out about pastors or any church leaders. They and their family are common targets of criticism and gossip. Of course being leaders in any organization, there is a certain expectation and standard that their subordinates expect of them. Life as a pastor or a pastor’s wife is definitely not an easy one. So if God should choose to matchmake me to a pastor or a missionary or a full time worker, I pray He gives me the extra grace needed to live up to that role, although that doesn’t mean I’m not open to guys of other vocations.

Honestly, guys who give their lives wholly to God have my respect and admiration for they are a rare breed. I have had the honour of capturing the interest of a pastor before and though he pursued me, I was reluctant to start a long distance relationship again after what happened to my previous relationship. It was not an easy task trying to discourage him gently for he was a great guy and I was never good at this even though I’ve done it a few times before. The last thing I want to do was to hurt him but I felt like I was distracting him from God’s work. So my fervent prayer is that the next time a great guy approaches me with more than friendship on his mind, I hope I won’t need to crack my head for an excuse to squirm my way out without causing any casualties.

Love in Unexpected Places

2006-11-13T01:08:00.000-08:00

I was still very hesitant about writing this post due to the delicate subject of those “Harry Potter books” and the last thing I want to do is open up a can of worms. There are still many differing viewpoints on whether Harry Potter books should be banned, burned or maybe…recycled? Or is the church overreacting about this particular series of children’s fictional books? I am not advocating that Christians should or should not read/watch Harry Potter but this is just to share my viewpoint and encounter with Harry Potter books.

The first time anyone actually asked me whether I had any problems with Harry Potter was when I was applying for a job as a facilitator for a children’s development centre. Since they use Harry Potter to make things more interesting in their science experiment classes, they actually asked me if I was comfortable using him in the classes since I told them I was a Christian. That was 2 years ago…and I had to admit, I have never seen or read any Harry Potter books or movies. Being ashamedly ignorant of the said character, I actually don’t have a stand on whether I was okay with it. And since this was a job interview and wanting to get the job….of course I said I had no problems even though eventually I declined their job offer.

Recently my college library obtained the first four books of the HP series, so I thought I might as well just read it and judge for myself or at least have an informed opinion.

I managed to finish the first book, Harry Porter and the Sorcerer/Philosopher’s Stone in one day. (Sorcerer is the Americanized version to appeal to the American market more). It was pretty engrossing book, pretty similar to Enid Blyton books. Although I wouldn’t approve of witch crafting and spell spinning, I was actually touched by one particular passage which spoke to me more or less like an analogy of God’s love for us.

Okay, before I go on, for those who have not read/watch this book/movie, what I’m going to write is going to be an ending spoiler. Therefore you have been warned…

Right after Harry’s encounter with the villain, Quirrell who allowed Voldemort inhabitate his body, Dumbledore, his principal came to visit him. Harry asked Dumbledore why Quirrel’s skin blistered red and raw when he tried to touch Harry. Dumbledore explained that his mother died to save him and if there’s one thing that Voldemort cannot understand, it is love. Voldemort didn’t realize that love as powerful as a mother’s can leave a mark…not a scar or visible sign. But a love so deep that even though the person who loved is gone, gives their protection forever, in the very skin of Harry Potter. Quirrell who was full of hatred, greed and ambition, sharing his soul with Voldemort could not touch him because of this reason. It was just agony to touch someone marked by something this good.

That particular passage touched me and made me cry because it suddenly reminded me of God’s love for me. In the same way Harry’s mother loved him so much that she died to save him, Jesus died to save me from my sins because He loved me. And though He did raise up from the dead and is alive today, He protects me from evil and only allow things that are beneficial to me to happen. He makes all things good for me if I love Him and obey Him. If the evil one wants to “touch me” he needs permission from God before he could do so. Isn’t that more amazing than a mother’s love!

I did a bit of reading on J.K.Rowling’s biography which kinda helped me understood life from her perspective. Her mother died at the age of 45 while still working on this book. She and her family was devastated. Desperate to get away for awhile, she went to Portugal and met and married a Portugese man. The marriage didn’t work out and she struggled as a single mother when she tried to finish writing the book.

Looking at her life, her mother was one of the important figures in her life and now that she herself is a single mother, it was understandable that in a way she projects herself as Harry Potter and his deep longing to know his mother and the love of a mother and a family. I felt that the book was more of a reflection of her life playing out “fantasies” with her sister and missing her mother rather than a book of witchcraft and wizardry.

So what do I think of Harry Potter books now? Well, to be honest, I have personally no problems reading those books. Plus they are highly entertaining, but of course children can be highly influenced and find it difficult to differentiate fact from fiction. But as long we guide them and keep level-headed, I believe books like this will not be able to shake our faith. After all, the last thing I expected was God to speak about His love to me through that book.

Holidays, Birthdays...and Happy Days!

2006-10-25T01:50:00.000-07:00

“Are you getting married?”
My colleague asked me as she eyed the book on Decorating for newly weds curiously on my table. I just laughed and shook my head. Apparently I had the itch to redecorate my bedroom so I had been borrowing all the books on interior decorating from the library. I actually didn’t notice the title of the book until I was taken aback by her question.

Well since the unfulfilled desire to own my own place is still not within my reach, the best alternative goal within my reach was to redo my bedroom…hence the book on my table. And probably also the creative bug in me is starting to itch having been neglected for too long…doing other boring stuff!

So my plan was to get all the inspiration and ideas as much as I could before the DeepaRaya holidays looms near. It’s seldom that we have two major national holiday celebration back to back so when it happens, it’s usually a long break. It also happened that Deepavali was right smack before my birthday too. So with the long break ahead, most of my friends and colleagues would be joining the exodus back to their ‘kampung’. I wasn’t up to joining the crowd and was looking forward to the long break of solitude.

Being constantly “disturbed” by my students and colleagues, I really treasured that time alone. Since my housemates were also away back to their in-laws’ place, I practically had the whole house to myself…at least for that short time. So on my birthdayI had a very busy day at the office and really wind down the quiet evening at the gym doing my favourite classes and spending some time with a few good looking hunks who were also very gay!

But I did spend the next morning of Deepavali visiting my colleague and student’s open house in Rawang…don’t even mention the jam. I was pretty knocked out by the time I got home but I had a good time eating those delicious Indian concoctions. Next in line would be….that much needed MAJOR SPRING CLEANING and REDECORATING!!

I never realised that cleaning just that one tiny bedroom took nearly two days to clean up and clear up all that clutter. And I haven’t even started on the bathroom yet. That took another day. I actually had nearly 6 bundles and one box of rubbish by the end of the spring cleaning! I was amazed at the amount of stuff I collected during my 6 years in KL. So I kept throwing away whatever I had not used for the last 2 years and kept what I thought was important to me….even that didn’t help lessen the clutter. Gosh I need to stop collecting STUFF!!

When I finally finished redecorating my bedroom, I was pretty proud of my effort. My favourite spot was…the bed! I did a hanging “headboard” for my bed using roses and butterflies hung on a white wire lattice.

And since I’ve always wanted a four poster bed but couldn’t afford it, this was the next best thing that I could think of. I always loved the romantic look of the four poster bead with the wispy organza curtains hanging by the sides of the bed so I hung the organza curtain on one side of the mini make-do four poster thingy.

And during the weekend, my lovely Acts Pink PG girls celebrated my birthday with me with a cake and a surprise present. It was a lovely pink fur pillow with crosswords on it. It went so well with my deco that I put it together on my bed. Kinda brightens up the whole place don’t ya think? Thanks so much gals! I’m so happy with it!

Not bad for an amateur redecorating her bedroom on a shoe string budget…hehe.

Hyppo Barney Rocks!!

2006-10-18T02:17:00.000-07:00

The ActsGames results were finally out after the long awaited two weeks. And the winner goes to....Hyppo Barney!! It was quite unexpected since the team didn't win alot of games, but did they score big time on the merit points!

I was just chatting with one of the committee members and she said that most of us were so focused on the games and superpower that they forgot that what happens behind the scenes are just as important. I guess we learnt a lesson from the Hyppo Barneys...Hip Hip Hurray! Hip Hippo Barney!

As for the winner of the cheerleading, the Red Hulks walked away as the champion while Pink Panthers came in second with very close marks. Pink Panthers were the Iron Team for being the team who was the strongest...surprise! surprise! I thought we did were around second or third.

The best Sportswoman went to Aunty Molly from Mata Kerbau and best Sportsman went to Alex Au Yong from Red Hulks. Way to go!

Finally, well done to all the teams out there, and thanks for that great support, spirit and fellowship! Can't wait for next year's ActsGames.

Pink Panthers Dynamite!!

2006-10-02T01:23:00.000-07:00

After a month of sweat and glory, ActsGames finally came to the finale last Sunday with the highlight of the event...the cheerleading event. If you're wondering what's ActsGames is, this is just a sports event held yearly by Acts Church to create "Unity through Diversity".

With the the different coloured power groups combined, we had 4 teams namely, Hyppo Barney(blue & purple)...not Hyppo Bunny as some mistakenly called it...but it sounds kinda cute. Then we have Mata Kerbau (white & yellow) as in the "Bull's Eye fried egg". If you don't understand...ask someone else!! And also our adorable Red Hulks (red & green)which at first glance reminds you of Christmas. Last but not least, Pink Panthers(black & pink) which is also my team....is the winning team for cheerleading last year. Go Panthers! I heard they did some cheerleading stunts that bowled the judges over last year. I wasn't around then...so no comments on that :) Besides cheerleading, we also had other games like badminton, bowling, pool, futsal and many more exciting games.

This year I am part of the cheerleading team and after a month of late night practices till midnight...phew! We finally performed in like, 5 minutes and it was over. One of the members actually recorded our stint and emailed to us...so I would like to share it with the rest of you. It's not very high quality(too large to upload) but at least can see what's happening lah! Nope, you won't see me much cos I'm mainly in the middle except for the third stunt part...if you can catch it. Enjoy!

Btw, the results for the cheerleading will only be announced on the 15th October...and the cheerleading round is 80 points! Don't play play hor! Till then...

Splish Splash...it's a Different World down there!

2006-09-19T02:04:00.000-07:00

White sandy beaches, clear blue skies, water so clear you can see the bottom…sounds like a taste of paradise isn’t it? Yup, I had a taste of paradise during the weekend at Pulau Redang as part of my company trip. And like my friend, we didn’t want to go back home. It was so much fun just swimming at the clear shallow waters, lazing around, snorkelling, more snorkelling and did I mention snorkelling?

The excitement started on Thursday night when I boarded the coach which will take us all the way to Marang Jetty. We reached the jetty at about 6am on Friday morning and dozed off while waiting for the first boat to depart which was around 9.30am. The trip on the ferry to Redang took us about 45 minutes so we looked at the beautiful scenery outside through the little port hole windows. When we finally arrived at the Laguna Redang Island Resort where we were staying, we registered at the lobby and while waiting, the first thing we did was to explore the beach. My roommate and I were so excited at the sight of the tempting clear waters that we couldn’t wait to jump in!

We dumped our bags and quickly went for lunch. The first snorkelling trip would be at 2pm so after lunch we rushed up to change and went to get our snorkelling gear. Our first snorkelling spot wasn’t too far and I thoroughly enjoyed the speedboat ride. We stopped at the open sea not too far away from the resort and pretty close to the shore as well. Since I was a “virgin snorkeller” I swallowed quite a lot of sea water, until my nose and throat was in pain but I really enjoyed myself and was just amazed at the different kinds of fish and corals under the sea. I don’t know most of the names but I learnt quite a bit along the way. Hehe..so clever!

The next snorkelling trip was to the Marine Park which was further away on Pulau Pinang (this is a different island from Penang). We departed at 9.30 the next morning and collected some bread when we reached there to feed the fishes there. The moment me and my friend waded into the pool, we could see schools of fishes swimming around our feet. We screamed in delight and excitement and started feeding the fishes with the bread. The fishes were so fierce when they saw the bread that one even bit my finger which was holding the bread! So “ganas”! Actually one of my friends even got bitten by a baby shark which was swimming about. Since he was so bony, the shark didn’t actually managed to get a bite out of him! But the baby shark actually took a bite and tried to shake a piece off of him…can you imagine what an adult shark would do? I don’t even want to begin to imagine. My friend didn’t provoke it but must have smelled blood on him or something.

It was pretty crowded near the jetty and I even saw a school of glass fish swimming around me in circles. I was so excited and tried to touch them but they kept their distance while still keeping together in a school…reminded me of the school of fish in “Nemo” which grouped themselves to shape words and arrows. I decided to explore further at the ship wreck
and managed to take underwater photos, a service by the resort people actually. Wish I had a underwater camera as well, just to capture all that beauty under the sea and take it back with me. Words are just not enough to describe all that I saw.

We came back from the Marine Park to have some lunch before going for the next snorkelling trip after lunch. My room mate and I were pretty tired but we still wanted to go and we didn’t regret it.

The last snorkelling trip was the furthest and we even saw a school of silver fish jumping in and out of the water together on the way. This time we could see a lot of soft corals especially “nemos” hiding among the anemones.

This last spot was the best but we had to swim pretty far from the boat to see the exotic soft corals. My room mate accidentally brushed her hand against the anemone and got stung. She ended up with red rashes along her forearm. She was concerned and asked the guide who said that it was not venomous and not to worry because he was stung many times before and that makes them “blood brothers”! Our guide was a real joker too…haha!

I nearly brushed against a sea urchin and that could have been serious though. We finally called it a day and I went back with a heavy heart.

I also discovered a favourite past time activity while I was in Redang during the nights. My room mate and I walked to the neighbouring resort through the beach and discovered some hammocks there. So we decided to try it out and slept there under the coconut trees. We were so comfortable and didn’t want to leave until we discovered that we spent about 2 hours on that hammock already. I could have slept there all night! Hmm…another feature to add to my dream house. The scuba divers also fascinated us and we even met friendly Mr Squirrel among the scuba diving gear. This is as natural as you can get.

Finally we had to say good bye and I was reluctant to leave because there were still so many things I have yet to try. There was the archery, the banana boat, the scuba diving, the kayaking, the beach dancing, the Jacuzzi….I must come here again. Or at least go snorkelling again so next stop would be Langkawi or maybe even …the Great Barrier Reef! Now I understand how Steve Irwin could be so passionate about wildlife….it’s so fascinating.

My snorkelling "kaki"

Look at the size of that brain!

The soft clam...saw some giant hard ones too...

This Christmas tree closes up and hides when you touch it!

Abundant Life...Do you have it?

2006-08-27T01:51:00.000-07:00

"E06? What's that?"
I had people asking me this question when I told them I am going for a conference at SIB KL. I actually not sure what the "E" stands for so I actually asked Ps. Lee Choo and she said it stands for 'exist'...which has a long history behind it. That's another story.... I nearly didn't go because the people who were supposed to go, all pulled out and I was the only one confirmed going. I had some trouble with finding transport as well, but I felt that God wanted me to be there and He provided me with all my transport needs...God is so good!

"So how was e06?"
This was the second most asked question to me when I came back from the conference. So to save time...and breath I decided to answer all these questions refering them to my blog. Smart eh?!! Hehe...I am excited to share with everyone what I've learned at the conference so I 'm going to share about each session. I will try, I said TRY to keep it short and sweet but hehe...not so sure I have been successful! There are actually 3 streams during the conference which is the youth, college and uni students and finally the stream I am in, the young adults. Let's start with...

Day One:

We had the morning message with Ps. Danny Guglielmucci entitled, "How Big is your God?" based on Psalm 139. In his message, Ps. Danny talked about how God has a plan for each of us. He doesn’t lose it or forget about it. And if we obey His commandments, we are walking in His will. Therefore His will and plans for our life will come looking for us. We don’t have to go looking around for the will of God for our lives.

So how big is your God depends on how you “see” God. Just like when things get magnified when we look through the magnifying glass, we need to see God under “our magnifying glass”. We must “magnify” God in order to get a bigger view of our God.

We also need God to search us for any sins in our lives. He doesn’t want to hurt us but to heal us. Do we trust God enough to have full control over our thoughts, our being, our life? When God calls us, He doesn’t compare us. Each of us are unique and God loves each and everyone of us because He just can’t help it.

In order to serve God effectively we need:
1. Revelation
We need to know who God is and what He has done.
2. Transformation
We need to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. We need to love our Bibles. Some may say the Bible is brainwashing people…so choose who washes your brain, the Bible or the world. It’s just not enough to read the Bible but to act on it be transformed by it.
3. Activation
There are 7 motivational gifts given for us to serve and activate our faith (Rom. 12:6-8)
4. Separation
We need to be separated from the world’s value system. The world wears branded stuff in order to have an identity but we have been branded by Christ.
5. Demonstration
We need to be loving people. If I don’t love people, I can’t lead them. We will be a Christian of demonstration when we have all of the above in order.

In Genesis 22, God told Abraham to kill his son to test his faith. When God tests parents, the kids get involved. The pastor carries the burden of the vision, the church have to carry the wood. Isaac knew how to follow and partner with his father. He didn’t have to be tied up or struggle but he helped to carry the wood. So the reason we serve is not because we want to earn our Father’s love and approval, but because we want to get involved with what our Father is doing. And in doing so, we have to die to self. And when we die to self, God will raise us up.

Opening Workshop: Stop and Look – What is this life all about? ~John 10:10~
This workshop started with a skit on a girl called Jane and her struggles with her career, relationship, family and faith. After that we had a group discussion on what happened in the skit and also to reflect on our own struggles. Every young adult begins life with their dreams but experience struggles along the way.

This session highlighted on how we respond to our struggles and how it affects our outlook in life. Young adults mostly struggle with their values, priorities, expectations and insecurities. These struggles expose a deeper issue which is basically a search for our own identity. Struggles are also like a crack in our life where the thief can come in and destroy but God also allows these struggles to build in us perseverance, then character and hope which gives meaning to our life and struggles.

So what is an Abundant Life? Is it a life or a lifestyle? An abundant life starts with the Bible. Life is not about the abundance around us but the abundance in our life. So the question is “Do you seek a “Life of Abundance” or an “Abundant Life”? Life is a journey. Struggles opens doors…but to whom? The thief or Jesus?

Love of Christ that never leaves me
Identity in Christ
Freedom from the law of sin and death
Eternal perspective of life

Workshop A: Look Out 1: Love thy neighbour: Negotiating the tension between Dogmatism and Tolerance by Ps. Sivin Kit

I chose this workshop mainly because of my daily encounter with gays and lesbians. And sure enough most of the group discussions chose to talk about this issue as well. Though there are no easy answers for each situation is different, but we as Christians should practice love in all our relationships with gays and lesbians.

Ps. Sivin actually posted on his blog about his experience during the e06 conference and I’ve also linked some interesting articles which he passed out to us which you can also find on his blog namely, "Uncommon Decency”where they addressed Christian civility and also a transcript of a videotape with Tony Campolo and his wife, Peggy in “Is the Homosexual My Neighbour?” The interesting thing about Tony and his wife is that Tony believes that the Bible does not allow for same gender sexual marriage nor is same gender sexual intercourse permissible. While Peggy, his wife believes in monogamous relationships, and within the framework of evangelical Christianity, gay marriages are permissible. With such extreme viewpoints, it’s amazing how the couple can still live harmoniously in a marriage relationship.

Day 2:

Workshop B: Look Out 2: What is Success? Living faithfully in a status-anxious world
by. Ps. Timothy Loh

We started off by discussing about what success means to each of us and who is our success hero. Of course each one will have their own definition what is success to them. But at the end of the day, we need to look at what the Bible have to say about success. Success begins with the Bible and God wants you to be successful!

We covered 4 sections which are:
Concept of Success
Component of Success
Charting Success
Challenges to Success

“Success is living life to the fullest potential in Christ without doing harm to any other parts of your life” ~ Ps. Timothy Loh~

Workshop C: Look Up: The return of the prodigal son

This is one of the most meaningful workshops for me. Ps. Lee Choo headed the session by showing a replica painting of Rembrandt’s Prodigal Son, painted by one of the church members. She also recommended the book by Henri J.M. Nouwen who did wrote his personal reflections on this painting. Good stuff! Must get the book.

We had group discussions within our group to talk about the struggles that the younger and older son went through in the parable and what were their choices/responses and ultimately the consequences. We also discussed about how the two sons viewed their Father. But ultimately the Father was good irregardless of how the two sons behaved.

In giving the younger son his inheritance, the Father was literally giving his son “a part of his life”…giving him the license to live as he wants to. The Father gave him the freedom to live and he squandered away his life. As a result, he lost his status, dignity, freedom and identity. He thought he understood life better than his Father. As a matter of fact, we struggle with giving our will to God because of the very same reason. But the younger son finally came to his senses and was restored and reconciled with his Father. He recognized him as Father and called him “Father”.

As for the older son, he was trying to earn his Father’s love instead of enjoying his Father’s love. He focused on WHAT he has done rather than WHO he is. He saw himself as a SON yet a SLAVE. He viewed his Father as “You” rather than as “Father”.

Actually this session reminded me of an old favourite song that I makes me cry every time I hear it. The song is entitled “When God Ran” by Craig and Dean Phillips. The lyrics were very meaningful. Good song.

Day 3:

Workshop D: Look In – What am I looking for?

We had Playback Theatre in this workshop, where someone from the audience tells a story from his life, chooses actors to play the different roles, then watches as their story is immediately recreated and given artistic shape and coherence. It is meant to help audience see their own experiences from the outside, including what happened and things they did to others. This is a way to initiate a shift of attention away from blaming the other to taking responsibility for the attitudes and actions of one’s self.

The main purpose of the playback theatre is to use this creative tool for the process of reconciliation, particularly in situations where relationships have been severely damaged by hatred, mistrust, oppression and discrimination. For our session, we had a girl who has a fractured relationship with a domineering mother and frustration over her timid father.

It’s not easy to forgive those past hurts especially done by those who should have loved us. We need to forgive and be reconciled with our past in order to reverse the curse of past generations and release God’s blessings and salvation to our family and future generation. This is essentially important especially for young adults who are the majority of people who will be getting married and starting their own family units.

Closing workshop: How then shall we live?

In this closing workshop, we walked through a tunnel of past sessions which we had done during the conference. We spent some time reflecting and writing a letter to God, sealed it and address it back to ourselves which the e06 committee will then post it back to us later.

We were also given goodie bags and “bread and wine” to have communion with our group members before going up front to be prayed for. Ps. Lee Choo prayed for me and gave me a word from the Lord. What she said to me…well, it’s kinda personal though meant to help change me and I’m slowly but surely being perfected day by day. It’s a promise!

“One Life One World” Concert – Great concert with lots of great music and free goodies! Special appearance of Superman A and Superman B…haha!

Day 4:

Community Carnival at Prima Selayang

This is where the “rubber meets the road”. A chance to make an impact in the community, in our world. Prima Selayang is a community of lower income group in this particular area where gangsterism and crime was rampant there. It was an outreach that SIB KL started a few years back and this is the third phase of the work. During the carnival, we had fantastic prizes for our Prima Idol, Treasure Hunt and Food Contest. We also gave out goodie bags containing food supplies and tins of milk powder…FOC!! The people in Prima Selayang sold food in the carnival and the 3 of the best tasting ones won prizes like microwave ovens, toasters, etc.

We had a special guest appearance by Juwita Suwito who also helped to train the contestants of the Prima Idol. The Prima Idol winner and first runner up were actually siblings. The title went to the elder sister and the prize was a personal computer. As for the Treasure Hunt the group who won got a mountain bike each. We also had face painting, balloon sculpture, games, and photo taking where they’ll take your picture with a colourful background of balloons, get it developed and they can come collect later all framed up. We also had a special guest appearance of our e06 Superman and the kids had a great time taking photos with him!

I was helping with the Treasure Hunt and literally explored the whole place! Humbling cos the kids knew where to look for the clues better than us cos they know the place like the back of their hands. But one incident that struck me most throughout the carnival was this elderly Indian man. On first sight he was an eccentric character which under normal circumstances I would think twice about approaching him. But as I observed him and his odd mannerisms, I was touched by him because out of all the people in Prima Selayang who came and participated in the carnival, he was the only person there who took the time and actually shook the hands to as many of the e06 people as he could see, recognized by our bright orange e06 T-shirt we had to wear that day. As he shook our hands, he thanked us and was so grateful for the work we are doing for the community.

When we announced the free tins of milk powder to be given out, there was a mad rush for the table and this man actually helped us to control the crowd and made them line up properly. In a way, it was like he wants to help give us back something as a way of showing his gratitude. He was truly an unforgettable character and shows us that the most unlikely character can have the biggest heart. Man may judge us by our looks but God knows our hearts. Like the 10 lepers, only one came back to thank Jesus. May we be like that one leper.

“One Life One World” Concert – another great night of good music, more free goodies. We had a special guest star who sang “Jesus loves me” and is only about 3 feet tall! As usual, Superman A and Superman B made their appearance to lighten up the atmosphere.

Conclusion:

"Can one man make a difference? Sometimes I believe I can. Some days I lose all faith..." ~Matt "Dare Devil" Murdoch~

Sometimes I can identify with what "Dare Devil" (a comic character) said. The Dare Devil was known to be "The man without fear" but "a man without fear is a man without hope." But we do not fear death's sting and our hope is in God. With God, we can do all things in Christ who strengthens us. And this e06 conference is about our lives making an impact to the world around us. To have an abundant life and redeem what the thief have come to steal, kill and destroy.

So if there’s one thing I learnt from e06 after all those workshops, it is that the reason I serve God is not because I want to earn his love and approval. I serve Him because I am His child, not His slave. My identity as God’s child is not dependent on WHAT I do. A child of God wants to participate in the Father’s work, not under compulsion, but out of love for the Father. Maybe this was the reason why I lost the joy of serving Him…I had a wrong perspective of my relationship with God.

I always struggled with the fear that God will not be pleased with me because I’m not as good a Christian as I should be. I feared disappointing and failing God in whatever I set out to do for Him. “God loves you” becomes just a cliché for me until I forget that He loves me not because of what I do. He loves me…period. And like the older son in the parable of the Prodigal Son, I have anger and resentment when God doesn’t “bless” me for my “hard work and faithfulness” to Him. So many times we forget that God’s blessings are all around us and are ours for the asking. The thief has stole my joy of serving God and tried to destroy my loving relationship with my Father. This has to stop and as I continue my journey in life, I will continue asking this question, “How Then Shall I Live?”

Step Up...the movie

2006-08-21T19:00:00.000-07:00

After "Take the Lead", here comes another one of those dance movies that just makes me want to get up and dance. The latest buzz that everyone seems to be talking about is "Step Up"...not the Bloom conference, but the movie.

I can't wait to see the movie...but when will it appear on our Malaysian cinema screens, that is the question. In the mean time, to whet your appetites, I've put some of the movie clips and music videos...and they are so cool! The dance moves are like a fusion of Hip Hop and Ballet....hmmm, seems a bit like the Funky Jazz I do in my gym. But anyway...the female lead, Jenna Dewan, also happens to be one of the actress in "Take the Lead" where she did the "threesome" at the dance competition. Now is her turn to be the female lead in this movie. To give you a glimpse of what is in store, here's a brief synopsis of the movie. Enjoy!

Everyone deserves a chance to follow their dreams, but some people only get one shot. Tyler Gage (Channing Tatum) is a rebel from the wrong side of Baltimore's tracks - and the only one thing that stands between him and an unfulfilled life are his dreams of one day making it out of there. Nora (Jenna Dewan) is a privileged ballet dancer attending Baltimore's ultra-elite Maryland School of the Arts - and the only thing standing in the way of her obviously brilliant future is finding a great dance partner for her senior showcase.

When trouble with the law lands Tyler with a community service gig at Maryland School of the Arts, he arrives as an angry outsider, until his skills as a gifted street dancer draw Nora's attention
Now, as sparks fly between them, both on and off stage, Tyler realizes he has just one performance to prove that he can step up to a life far larger than he ever imagined. .Featuring the directorial debut of leading choreographer Anne Fletcher, the film also stars R & B superstar Mario, Drew Sidora as well as rap legend Heavy D.

Note: Due to the long suffering my friends have to endure to download the video, I have removed the clips attached to this post...BUT you can always watch them here Have fun!!

My first trip to Lagoon!

2006-07-29T02:06:00.000-07:00

I think most people might not believe this but today was the first time I actually went to Sunway Lagoon Dry and Wet Park after living in Subang for 6 years. My dance 'kaki' had 2 free tickets to spare so she, me and another dance 'kaki' all went to have a day of fun courtesy of her boss.

The first thing we saw was the 'hooking the floating ducks' stall. The big prize was all those giant soft toys attracting everyone's attention. We wanted to try but finally found out that it wasn't that easy cos we had to hook the duck with a no. 1 written under it...which naturally you can't see. And to add to that, out of all the many ducks there, there is only one no. 1 duck. So what are the chances? You calculate yourself. No prizes for the right answer!

We saw the cage with a few tigers lazing around and they looked quite cute and cuddly...when they are in this docile mood of course. We explored further into the limestone exhibition site where they highlighted an expansive collection of limestones.
They even had a corner where the head of a dinosaur comes roaring out among some wooden carvings. Very artistic!

Later we decided to walk across the long hanging bridge...and boy was it long. No mean feat so grandmas and grandpas, make sure you have the heart and energy for it. We could get a great overview of the park there and it's amazing to see how the waterpark was designed and built up.

We walked on towards the wet park but each of us didn't bring any change of clothings, so we avoided getting wet. We caught a quick lunch there and finally went to see the speedboat ride at the Extreme Park. The main attraction was a cute guy who looked abit like our dance instructor...but our conclusion at the end of the day was that he was probably gay cos he hung around with 3 other guys who looked liked they were too....or maybe it was just "sour grapes"? Haha...

We finally went to explore the dry and not so dry park. I was game to try the rides but there were a long queue for most of the rides and my other two friends were not very "young at heart"...to put it more politically correctly, they didn't want to join in any rides at all but instead just wanted to sit down somewhere and chat. So I went at it alone and just went on any ride I could.

Finally we went to the souvenir shops and koi pond on our way out. It was an uneventful day but nevertheless fun...at least for me. Now I can finally say I've been to Sunway Lagoon!!

Sticking his nose in the wrong place?

2006-07-25T17:58:00.000-07:00

Oooh...isn't he cute??!! Probably being naughty and sticking his nose between the fence panels. This is just one of my colleague's golden retriever...the naughtiest one actually. His name is Sheriff and supposed to be the "beauty king" of the lot. Got the looks but not the brains...just like humans.

The rest of the gang ...she's got THREE okay...are below. On the left is Muffin and the right is Hunter. Both of them got the brains but not the looks...haha. Hunter and Sheriff was bought back from the shop but Muffin was picked up from the streets. They advertised for a month and since nobody came to claim her, she decided to keep the dog. Well, Muffin didn't look that good when she picked her up...but just look what a little TLC can do :)

And now for the group photo! Ain't they just adorable...how I wish I could keep one. Sigh...Goldren Retrievers are one of my favourites in the DOGdom. And my colleague is just lucky she gets to spend her time with all different mongrels during her weekends...she trains dogs during her weekends. Wouldn't have thought that she was that type of person since she is the IT whiz among our staff...like the say, "Never judge a book by its cover."

It's All About CONTROL...

2006-07-09T00:33:00.000-07:00

It was right after the Unboxed Event that I encountered this temptation…the temptation to know my FUTURE!!! One of the diploma students was doing some tarot cards reading with some lecturers and students right outside the courtyard where we had our event.

So as the saying goes, “Curiosity killed the cat”…well, I was curious enough to stand there and listen as one by one sat down to have their “fortunes read”. And sure enough one thing led to another, I ended up in front of the girl too, wanting to know what my “fortune held for me”. After hearing all the spicy details that my students and colleagues had in their “fortunes”, I was hoping to hear some spicy details about mine too.

When the cards were finally shuffled and laid out to be read, all she said was, “Nothing major is happening in your life right now. Everything’s under control. There are minor problems here and there but that’s part of life.” I was like, “That’s it? Gosh my life is so boring!” She gave me a look and said, “I didn’t say that. It’s just that you have your life under control. Everything that comes your way, you are able to handle it. If you keep what you are doing now, you will eventually be able to fulfil your dreams.”

Then my student who was standing next to me started getting cheeky and asked, “What about her love life? Or her sex life?” I gave my student a warning look but he just kept on encouraging the tarot reader. So she said, “Nothing major is happening in her love life. Or in her sex life.” Of course there’s nothing happening in my sex life…I’m not married yet!! Then she said something that gave me a shock… “Her boyfriend is not doing anything major about the relationship either.” I looked at her and said, “What boyfriend? I don’t have a boyfriend.”

She just shrugged and said, “Well the cards say there is definitely someone who is in love with you. Maybe he hasn’t appeared in your life yet or he hasn’t made known his feelings to you yet.” By now I don’t know whether to believe her or not anymore. I mean anyone can say anything in general and we just believe them and make all these “self-fulfilling prophecies”. Well, forgive me but I am a sceptic about a lot of things and it turns out that I was not the only one because my colleague wanted to do it a second time just to see whether the cards will be the same as the first time a few minutes ago. Well it turned out a little different but the majority of it was the same. Coincedence? Well, you make your own decision.

Well, after going through all the things that were said that night, I felt so bad, I repented and prayed for forgiveness. God told us to TRUST HIM and nobody else about our future. He is the one that holds our future in His hands and nothing is going to happen to us that He has not allowed it and He does it in our best interest because He loves us more than life itself. I know we like to know our future so that we can control how we want it to turn out. But I have come to the conclusion that I am never and never will be in control of my future and the only way I can have a life which is under control is a life under His control.

So I will still continue to dance to my heart’s desire and it doesn’t matter if I don’t achieve my dreams, I’m just doing what I’m passionate about. Below are just some pix (tho quite blur cos it was taken from my handphone) taken of two of my dance ‘kaki’ who helped to perform for our Unboxed Event. The main dancer couldn’t make it last minute due to fever but I thought the red fans were cool!

Take the Lead...never follow

2006-07-06T22:50:00.000-07:00

Can Antonio Banderas dance? I have seen "Shall We Dance" and Richard Gere can definitely sway. But I have yet to see Antonio Banderas, the actor who is famous for his macho, he-man roles, dance. Hmm...maybe he did in Evita, I forget. So this I gotta see. Listening to all my dance 'kaki' rave about the movie and how it made them want to get up and dance along in the cinema, sure whetted my appetite. But then, even if they didn't say anything, I would have not missed it.

Based on a true story of how a dance teacher wanted to teach a bunch of street kids that nobody thought they had any future, how to dance. Oh, these kids can dance but ballroom dancing? And in the end, he didn't just teach them about ballroom dancing, but about life. To teach them to believe in themselves. That if they want to achieve something, they had to work at it and not blame your circumstances for pulling you down. To teach the guys how to treat a lady with respect cos beating your wife, isn't going to solve any problems. To teach them how to stand out from the rest...and take the lead not follow behind someone else's shadow.

Inspiring! I loved the part where Antonio danced the tango with the professional female dancer. Quoting from one of the characters, "It was like making love on the dance floor"...the passion, the body language, the way they looked at each other...so hot! Gosh I just art of dancing and how they use it to convey messages that words are not enough to express. But in this movie, they kind of did a ballroom dancing and hip hop fusion to the choreography...and it ROCKS!

The finale of course was the ballroom dancing competition and I loved the way it surprised us with the 'threesome' dance. Though the students didn't win, it was very obvious they were the better group. All in all it was a good watch and wouldn't mind watching it again.

Step Up and ....BLOOM!

2006-06-24T18:02:00.000-07:00

Boy, it feels good to be a woman! The world will never be complete without women...Can I hear all my girlfriends out there say "AMEN!" Haha...no I didn't join some feminist movement, in case you wondered what had happened to me. I just finished the BLOOM 2006 Women's Conference at Acts Church on the 23 and 24th June.

Hey if you missed it (I'm speaking to the girls only)...catch the next one next year. Believe me, you won't regret it. Well I actually missed the Fashion Show sponsored by Blook cos I was abit late but at least I got the goodie bag! For this year we had the GREATEST goodie bag ever. There were like loads and loads and loads and loads of stuff.... like Her World Magazine, Cadbury Center-Filled Cookies, Cadbury Gold gigantic bar of chocolate, Dutch Lady Iced Latte, Lipton Green Tea with Lemon, Cosway lipbalm, Nestum cereal, Estime Skin Care pack, Ginvera Shampoo, Ginvera Marvel Gel, Bio-Essence sample, AND AND.... a BLOOK VIP Card!! Which you can only get if you spend RM500 and above in a single receipt on normal occassions!! Come on... is that cool or what?!! And that is just for starters... We had like bonus prizes hidden under our seats and there were like loads of gifts just being given out every session! Even the speakers' clothes were sponsored by Blook...jealous...

Hey for only RM20, it's definitely worth it! We had sumptuous tea breaks...which seems more like main meals catered by Banana Cafe among the beautifully decorated church. The halls were decorated with tea lights and fresh flowers...was so tempted to bring one back. Each of the chairs were tied with a satin pink or cream ribbon, making the place look so sweet and inviting...a woman's touch!

But the best part of the conference were the sessions. Ps. Sandra shared about the value of a woman. She taught us about how women have more 'details' because there is 'architecture' in a woman's body...so who says a woman is not valuable in God's eyes! And like wine, a woman's spirit gets better by the years...haha, imagine women are like fine wine.

In Ps. Lee Choo's sessions, she taught about the purpose of womanhood. Though hard to accept, what she said about "pain being a part of authentic womanhood" is so true. Women go through so much pain throughout the centuries because of always being treated 'second class' or as 'property' by men. That's why the feminist movement came about. Then it slowly evolved to the modern women's cry of today as modeled in shows like "Sex in the City" where the 'message' is, "I will not allow men to hurt me, and if they don't hurt us, we will hurt them first."

So what really is womanhood? Being a woman is not about being better than a man. Both man and woman are needed to "bear the image of God" without which it is not complete. Guys and girls have distinctive qualities in each that helps to bring out the best qualities in each other and together they produce a synergy that enhances each other's potential. Isn't God's creation amazing! That's why the whold purpose of gender differences is liken to "as iron sharpens iron". There are bound to be fireworks but each one comes out better for it. Therefore gay/lesbian relationships is a form of running away from relationships that can build character.

So only a woman can be a suitable helper for a guy in a marriage relationship because only a woman can confront a man about his maleness...and it doesn't help if a woman acts like a man! In a marriage relationship, the woman's role is to complement and not compete with the man. She is meant to encourage (to lend courage) because the man's greatest fear is failure. She is also meant to confront the man about his weakness and to challenge the men to become REAL MEN!

So the purpose of a woman is to be a builder of relationships and family. Women who do not fulfill that purpose end up dividing the church/relationships through gossip or slander. So if women do not understand their purpose of womanhood, the men will not be able to fulfill theirs and the result is one BIG MESS.

In the second session, Ps Lee Choo also talked about boy/girl relationships. She talked about how each individual have different love languages. But no matter what our love language is, we are not to build our identity on our love language. Our self worth comes from knowing how much we are worth. She also talked about how the Bible commands guys to love their wives but not to the wives. The reason is simply because women just LOVE NATURALLY while guys need to learn how to love. Therefore the greatest need for girls is affection, but for the guys is admiration. She ended the session with an altar call and Ps. Sandra prayed for me when I went up. I really needed to be prayed for and I was truly encouraged and refreshed during the conference.

I better end the posting here before someone thinks I'm giving them a sermon. It's just that I'm so excited to share all these 'treasures' that I've learned. But just let me end here with a cute quote from Ps Lee Choo about guys and girls who are looking for their marriage partner:

For the girls: "When you get yourself right, the right guy comes."
For the guys: "Every girl is right if you treat them right."

I couldn't agree more. So Bloom where ever you are girls!

Why so downcast O my soul?

2006-05-31T21:49:00.000-07:00

Recently I seem to be having a few upheavals in my personal relationships and also those around me. Don’t you get the feeling that sometimes months go by without something big happening and all of a sudden it all just comes pouring upon you? Is it me or it is absolutely no fault of mine. *blinks innocently*

In the past few weeks, I seem to have upset one of the most patient and sweetest guy I know…though not intentionally. I’ve apologized and tried to make things better but he hasn’t been replying my messages nor picking up my calls. Zip. Nada. Nothing. I don’t know but lately I feel like whatever I say or do, people seems to be reacting negatively or things just blows up in my face.

Then my brother did a very good job in making me feel like a failure by letting me know I am not making enough to help with the family finances. It’s bad enough that I am already frustrated with the fact that I do not have the resources to get a degree or get a place of my own… or even my own wheels. Now he even puts more guilt on me cos my mother was contemplating going back to work so that she has enough funds to make it till the end of the month, what with rising petrol prices and inflation getting worse. At their age, my parents should be retired and we children should be the ones providing with a better lifestyle… but this ideal seems to elude me.

I have also been feeling resentful lately when the people at work seems to assume that I am always readily available to help them with favours. Sometimes they don’t even have the courtesy to ask, they just email their colleagues to ask me to do it for them… and I wasn’t even included in the mailing list! Or ask people to just dump it to me without even informing me to expect it. What am I? A robot? I have my work cut out for me too. It isn’t fair that work gets dumped on me just because you are on your break and not around to do the work. I can’t remember the last time anyone ever approached me to ask if they could help me with something. It’s always what I can help them with. Is it surprising that I feel taken for granted sometimes?

And just recently I happened to talk to one of my instructors at the gym after class about doing something for one of my school’s events. He was standing next to his ‘partner’ when I approached him to ask him a question. Then I noticed the way his ‘partner’ was looking at me up and down. You know the saying about “If looks could kill”… well I probably could have dropped dead by the way he was looking at me. He looked at me like I was a "piece of meat" rather than a person. So I just walked away after that one question… and am thinking twice again about doing business with this instructor. Hello… I don’t have any ulterior motives if that was what he was thinking. And if he thinks I’m interested in that instructor, please…I wouldn’t even give him a second thought even if he was straight! I know people don’t have the power to make you feel inferior unless you give them permission…but that incident left a very bitter taste in my mouth.

Been feeling discouraged as well as I feel that there is so much more gifts and talents in me that I can give to the world but am not fully utilizing it cos I don’t seem to have avenue to make use of it in my line of work. Is it ever possible to do what you are passionate about and still be able to put food on the table? I seem to be dreading waking up every morning cos I don’t seem to have the mood to do anything. Always lethargic and tired, avoiding people if possible. Crying till my eyes are bloated in the mornings…and wishing that I don’t have to face anyone cos I feel like everyone can see my swollen eyelids.

I also seem to be having these minor migraines lately…hopefully it’s from the crying and not something more serious. Hopefully this is just a phase… or are these symptoms of a burnout. “Daddy, I know You are listening…but why do You seem so silent? You know what I need right now… I am hoping that You would send someone to give me a hug and tell me, `Don’t worry baby, everything’s going to be alright.’ cos right now I feel like I have the whole world on my shoulders.”
There… I’ve let it all out. How come I don’t feel any better? I feel very vulnerable and don’t really like myself very much right now.

“Why so downcast O my soul? Put your hope in God.” ~ Psalm 42:5 ~

Grease...it's a disappointment

2006-05-21T01:12:00.000-07:00

What with all the hype about this classic musical, I thought surely this is a must-see. I have watched their shows, sang their songs and even danced to the music. So for RM135, I must have set my expectations quite high.

As I entered the Plenery Hall at KLCC in anticipation, hoping to that my seat had a good view. As the picture taken from my handphone shows, it's a pretty good view just a tad bit far.

The show started with the radio dj coming out and inviting some of the audience to come up on stage to dance. Quite a number came up to dance but only 3 got a prize each...some Grease merchandise. Then they started introducing the T-birds and the Pink Ladies during their lunch break. Singing those familiar songs, I can hear some of the audience singing along with them.

The musical progressed on quite slowly and I was looking forward to two of my favourite songs which was "Born to Hand Jive" and "We Go Together". Both was a disappointment. The two lead characters hardly stood out among the rest of the cast. They lacked that "Oomph!" factor. The one who really stood out was the High School Principal who sang "Beauty School Dropout". Her voice was beautiful...as they say, the blacks are most talented musically! I liked they way they made the scene "heavenly" with all the "angels" as the background singers and dry ice creating the "heavenly ambience". For me that was the only highlight of the whole musical.

Other than that the musical was just....ok. When I asked my other friends who went, they said the same thing. Actually most of the audience I saw on that day were mostly seniors...haha...that shows how old Grease is and what generation we came from! The merchandise were quite nice though. I loved the bright pink and black colour comby so I bought the baby polo T which is all black with "Grease, It's still the Word" embroidered in that trademark pink. Love it! Sigh...and that's about all I loved about that day.

Too sexy for my....

2006-04-07T01:51:00.000-07:00

I’m not one who is comfortable receiving compliments…especially when a guy tells me that I look sexy, even though he is a confirmed gay all the way! But then again, when a gay tells a girl that she looks sexy, does it count cos he sure doesn’t look at girls the same way that a straight guy does….hmmm.

Well it all happened when Fitness First launched the new release of the Les Mills classes and there were T-shirts up for sale. So this particularly T-shirt really caught my eye cos it had a really unique design and looked really cool. (See picture below). Being a softy for pretty things, I decided to get one as well…and yet wondering at the same time whether I dare to wear it or not. Coming from a very strict family background, my father would scold me if I so much wear a sleeveless top or too short a skirt…what more this slinky top! Actually he also scolds my mum for wearing sleeveless too…I guess only a father knows how a guy thinks.

But then I thought, what the heck, since I bought it I might as well wear it since it didn’t come cheap too. So I decided to wear it to my next hip hop class together with my baseball cap since we were doing a cap dance that day. In the middle of the class, one of my friends had a very bad leg cramp and had to stop the class. I was helping him to take off his sneakers when my instructor decided to choose that very opportune moment to say to me, “Wah! why so sexy today?” The whole class suddenly looked at me and not knowing where to hide my face, I took my cap to cover my face. I thought he should know by now I’m very shy shy one!

Later back home, I got an sms from my instructor telling how cool I looked in that sexy top and that I should dare to wear that kind of clothes more often. In the back of my mind I picture my father and some guys from my church lecturing me on my dressing if I ever followed this piece of advice. Hmm…frankly I still don’t feel comfortable being called sexy or wearing sexy tops like that mainly because I’m not used to it and also feel a bit overexposed.

I guess it kind of set me thinking, does sexy means having to reveal more flesh? Can’t a woman be sexy without having to show a leg or breast? How do you define sexy? And when does showing too much flesh becomes skanky?

According to the Free Online Dictionary, sexy means :
1. Arousing or tending to arouse sexual desire or interest.
2. Slang Highly appealing or interesting; attractive.

And yet sexy can mean a lot of things to different people, just as one man’s beauty is another man’s beast…or something corny like that. Sexy is definitely in the eye of the beholder. So we can’t really define sexy because it is different for everyone.

So what does God thinks of sexy? I think God created us women to be sexy, though not the same definition of what the world defines as sexy. God made us sexual beings so our sexuality is more than just the way we dress or look, but it is in the way we think, in our gentle and quiet spirit, all that makes us who we are.
The Bible’s Hebrew word for sex is yada which means, “known, recognized, understood, respected.” The word is used both in reference to a man and wife having sexual intercourse and, along with other usages, in reference to a person being in deep fellowship with God. Because sexy is the adjective form of sex, it can mean that in God’s eyes we’re known intimately, recognized to the core of our being for who we are.

Of course, God includes the physical appeal that the world defines as sexy within His precious Word. Proverbs 5:18-19 says, “May you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer — may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be captivated by her love.”

That verse acknowledges that we have the power to be captivating. But take a look at how many women captivate the guy in Proverbs.

Did you get it?

One.

The wife of his youth.

When you put the definition of yada together with this verse, it says to me that there are deep secrets about us that only our husband is supposed to know. God did create us to be sexy, but not our world’s cheap compromise of sexy. When we choose to be sexy for only our husband, we live according to God’s purpose. And that is definitely sexier than any definition the world throws at us!

Sofia Boutella...what a dancer!

2006-03-16T00:57:00.000-08:00

If you ask me which hip hop dancer I admire, it’s definitely Sofia Boutella. She is amazing. Just looking at her twisting and turning her body like rubberband, and doing those break dance moves just makes me want to aspire to that level of professionalism.

You’d probably go like, “Sofia who???” She may not be that well known over this part of Malaysia but she is pretty well known over in Europe. I was first introduced to her when Nike introduced this new workout called the Nike Rockstar Hip Hop Workout. In partnership with the famous choreographer/director Jamie King, who has achieved stardom working with stars like Britney Spears, Madonna, JLo, Janet Jackson, etc, this workout promises some really cool moves. Working together with Rihanna in her release of her second album, “A Girl Like Me”, introducing the single called “Rescue Me (SOS)” features a sample of the classic 1981 tune “Tainted Love" by Soft Cell, a cover of the song by Gloria Jones.

When I first watched the Nike promotional ad, I was quite impressed with her moves. She can really bend! Below is the advertisement that shows just what I mean…

This one is featuring the collection from the Nike Rockstar Hip Hop workout. Check it out…

Not only can she dance, she can act and this is just a dance clip from the French movie “Le Defi” or “The Challenge”.

I can only dream to be able to dance like that…

Geisha or Kept Woman

2006-02-10T00:06:00.000-08:00

I finally had the time to catch the much talked about movie, “Memoirs of a Geisha” after postponing it time and again due to my busy schedule. I’ve heard how the book was talked about, read about in most of my teenage years and up to my adult life, making it a ‘must read’ classic literature. Now everyone can see it on the big screen.

Of course most of what I heard about the books are from female magazines since they are the so called ‘gurus’ on the art of seducing and catching that elusive commitment-phobic man…talk about stereotyping!! So of course the book came in highly recommended since being a Geisha is about a “woman who has mastered the art of seduction” as how Mameha (Michelle Yeoh’s character) teaches her virginal protégé Sayuri (Zhang Ziyi’s character) on "stopping a man in his tracks with a single look". Some people think that a Geisha is just a glamourous name for being a hooker…but I think the Japanese will highly contest that.

Not that I want to watch the movie to learn how to “stop a man in his tracks with a single look” but just curious about what the hype was all about. I’ve always wanted to read the book but just kept postponing it again and again…so now that it is on big screen….no need to read the book lor!

It is a beautifully crafted movie and has some powerful acting but I think it didn’t do much justice to Hatsumomo’s character (acted by Gong Li). I thought her character was a bit one-dimensional in her bitterness. There wasn’t really any attempt to explain how the beauty became the bitch. Then again, I didn’t read the book….I guess every movie that’s made based on the book will have to sacrifice some of its story to suit the big screen.

Also coming from a different generation and culture, it was kind of puzzling to find how Sayuri’s ‘debut dance’ made her the most desirable geisha in Japan…I thought it was some kind of ritual walk in high stilts!!! Then there was the part where you could see the pained expression on her face when she gets forcefully undressed and all but raped by The Baron. And yet when she finally sold her ‘virginity’ to the highest bidder…which turns out to be some doctor old enough to be her grandfather, she has no trouble going through with it.

Though of course she finally gets her ‘dream guy’ in the end…though marriage is out of the question, it’s kinda of a bittersweet ending. Though she always dreamed to become a geisha so that she could be with her dream guy, in the end I wondered if all that she has endured really worth it if in the end he can’t even marry her. Morally it is just wrong and even if she is the only one in his life, she is just playing the role of a ‘kept woman’ or ‘mistress’. Being a woman, I don’t understand how any woman can accept that kind of life.

On the lighter side, MadTV made fun of the movie with their version of the Geisha trailer. With Bobby Lee's simpering, cross-eyed smile when told to "stop a man in his tracks with a single look", I think any man wouldn't only stop at the sight of such a hideous drag queen, they'd also puke.

But of course, MadTV got the gist of the story right. It's really about "a poor but beautiful girl who turns into a hooker...I mean…a Geisha" I love the blue eyes on Sayuri’s character. Gave me the inspiration to get my own blue contacts. Totally love the look!!

Absolutely Delirious

2006-02-02T21:56:00.000-08:00

The AYA Festival 2006 is on again! And this time we have Delirious coming to town. For those who are not familiar with this group, they are the ones who wrote these familiar songs which we sing during our worship like, “I can sing of Your love forever” or “Did you feel the mountains tremble?” One of my favourite is “The Happy Song” though I first heard it sung by Chris Tomlin. Nothing prepared me for the incredible performance that they put up.
The sound system was world-class…I think they brought in their own mixers and stuff and the effects were really amazing. It was like watching a U2 or some international band in concert. At yet this band is incredibly humble and is only glad they can serve and minister God’s Word through their music. They utterly availed themselves to AYA to use them fully and make their time here in Malaysia as fruitful as possible.

I know that fame can really get into some people’s head and cause them to glorify their music more than God. But this is not what I see in this group and I believe they are where they are today because they make themselves accountable to each other and to always check themselves. They also made a priority to put their family first by not being away from home for more than 2 weeks (if I remember correctly…) so that at least their children know how their father still looks like!! But I remember the hilarious statement that Martin Smith said when Ps. Kenneth was complimenting them on how humble they were. He said, "Sometimes jetlag makes you look more humble than you really are." Haha…

I’ve always believed that music is a powerful tool to reach to the younger generation. And what I’ve seen here is a testimony of how music can be used to expand God’s kingdom and also to glorify His name. Yet music can also be powerful enough to cause violent behaviour and to dishonour God’s name. You don’t have to look far to see that kind of music nowadays.

So it was a real privilege to be able to watch this band in action and watch how God is working through them. You can also read all about it in the article featured in the Star.

I'm really looking forward to the next AYA Festival 2007. The news is the band GMB from Indonesia might be coming down. Liked their songs when I bought their CD when I was in Indonesia for a mission trip back in 2004.

Se7en

2006-01-06T21:55:00.000-08:00

Seven…such a magical number. Below are my whimsical rantings on seven….

Se7en Things I Plan To Do

….with immediate effect

1. Clean up my room
2. Smile and encourage/compliment someone
3. Start sleeping earlier and stop skipping meals…especially my dinner.
4. Challenge myself more physically…it’s high time I add more weights for my BodyPump class…Sue, if you’re reading this, I know I know…and stop laughing!!!
5. Throw away all the “white elephants” in my room…dunno why I am such a collector of “rubbish” as my father would say.
6. Practice my piano AND violin more often….I’m trying to aim at 2 hours a day…hmmm, with my schedule, I’m more like aiming to fail!
7. Stop procrastinating so much…haha…what an oxymoron…

….not so immediate

1. Finish my Grade 8 or diploma or higher for my piano and violin…ha! Getting really ambitious…
2. Get an apartment/house of my own…too tired of renting rooms and shifting house
3. Go bungee jumping or parachuting.
4. Learn how to do break dancing…my inspiration is Sofia Boutella. Love her dancing.
5. Revamp my wardrobe and image. I have too many ‘fashion boo-boos’ sitting in my cupboard, too shy to see the light of day and still clueless on how to style my hair!
6. Keep up to date on the latest graphic design softwares like Adobe Creative Suite. I’m way out of touch with them for too long.
7. Get a PhD in something!! And I don’t mean ‘permanent head damage’!!

Se7en Things I Can Do
1. Sing and play the piano at the same time…hey, it’s an accomplishment for some!
2. Dance hip hop, though not as good as I like to.
3. Spend a whole afternoon in a bookshop.
4. Bake the most sinful fruit cake…yummy!
5.Splurge on clothes I really like.
6. Paint and decorate my room.
7. Write the most boring songs nobody ever had the misfortune to hear!

Se7en Qualities I Want in a Mate
1. Loves God
2. Loves me
3. Knows how to make me laugh
4. Kind and affectionate
5. I can feel safe with
6. Protects and fights for me…when appropriate
7. A good leader

Se7en Things I Say Most
1. Mass Comm…this is what I say each time I answer my phone at work
2. Thank you
3. Wah liao!
4. Dear Daddy…when I pray…
5. Shoot!
6. Hello
7. Bye!

Seven days a week…seven wonders of the world…seven deadly sins….7-Up!

Shameless or Purposeless...

2006-01-03T21:50:00.000-08:00

I’m not much of a book reviewer but I just finished reading this book called Shameless by Paul Burston and I kinda have lots of mixed feelings about the whole story. With my busy schedule, it’s not easy for me to squeeze much time to read fictional works but after reading the synopsis of this book my curiosity was piqued so I dived in. Also part of the reason was because one of the supporting characters share my name too…not that she is anything like me in particular!

The synopsis read like this…

“Martin is kind, decent and good-looking. And look where it's got him. His
boyfriend of four years has run off with a male prostitute. His friends John and
Caroline are no help-John prefers infamy to sympathy and Caroline is too busy
trying to work out if her wonderful, sensitive boyfriend is a closet case. And
to top it all, Martin's hippie father turns up to stay, wearing his "Proud to be
an Embarrassing Parent" badge. And so Martin jumps head first into hedonism,
throwing himself into the gay club scene, a world of drugs and muscles, hard
bodies and harder music. Meanwhile Caroline is learning that being Shameless has
its price, and so does she...How long can they keep up with the lifestyle? And
can they find the man of their dreams when sex has become a substitute for love,
and pleasure is measured in beats per minute...?”

This is the first time I actually read a literary work on gays, though fictional. So it was very enlightening to read about gays and their lifestyles….though reflective of most gays in real life or not, I’m not so sure.

The main character, Martin, is a gay who’s going through some reshuffling in his life since his boyfriend dumped him. So he tries going to the gym to build some bulk and get rid of his spare tyre. His friend, John introduced him to the world of clubbing, partying as well as drugs. As Martin tries to build up his self-esteem again after being dumped by trying to find another boyfriend, he finally found out what a two-faced friend John was and cut off all ties with him. Martin finally finds his ‘prince charming’ in the end after a couple of disappointments.

Caroline, his close friend is so afraid that her boyfriend is a gay gets so paranoid that he broke it off with her. She finally finds out in the end that it is her boyfriend’s father who is gay and finally gets back together with her boyfriend.

One of the strongest emotions that I felt while reading this book was the purposelessness of it all. Is life only about partying and having a good time? Is getting your ‘soul mate’ the ultimate purpose and destiny of our lives? Where is that higher purpose in life? There must be more to life than this right? God doesn’t seem to play a role in any of their lives and maybe that what makes the purposelessness so apparent in this story to me.

I believe life is much more than just living for ourselves. We must be meant for a higher purpose than just to live, survive and die. Like King Solomon says,

"Everything is meaningless, utterly meaningless!
What do people get for all
their hard work? Generations come and go, but nothing really changes. The sun
rises and sets and hurries around to rise again. The wind blows south and north,
here and there, twisting back and forth, getting nowhere. The rivers run into
the sea, but the sea is never full. Then the water returns again to the rivers
and flows again to the sea. Everything is so weary and tiresome! No matter how
much we see, we are never satisfied. No matter how much we hear, we are not
content.” ~ Ecclesiastes 1:2-8 ~

King Solomon, who is the wisest and richest person that ever lived, says that everything is meaningless. He had everything he could possibly want; power, respect, riches, wisdom, anything his heart desired he was not denied. Yet at the end of his reflection on life, this is what he says,

“Yes, remember your Creator now while you are young, before the silver cord
of life snaps and the golden bowl is broken. Don't wait until the water jar is
smashed at the spring and the pulley is broken at the well. For then the dust
will return to the earth, and the spirit will return to God who gave it.

Here is my final conclusion: Fear God and obey his commands, for this is
the duty of every person. God will judge us for everything we do, including
every secret thing, whether good or bad.” ~ Ecclesiastes 12:6, 7, 13 ~

Hmm…if a guy like that finally comes to such a conclusion, so what more us mere mortals, who only seems to live from paycheck to paycheck, struggling to accomplish as much as we can with our meager resources? Enough said.

A Backward Glance at 2005

2005-12-30T21:49:00.000-08:00

...5...4....3....2....1...HAPPY NEW YEAR!! *fireworks*

Can't believe another year has come and gone. Another 525,600 minutes spent and never to be retrieved again. I remember exactly one year ago today I was in church for the Watchnite service(naturally). My close friend and ex-colleague, Bee was back and so were a lot of old friends I haven’t seen for a long time. Was so excited to see her and made an appointment to meet up so that we could catch up with each other the next day together with the “5 sisters”.

Fast forward a year later, I’m in church for the Watchnite service again with the “fireworks” from the keyboard going off at the opportune time. After reflecting for the year gone by, here I am deciding whether to move on to another church. Part of the reason was because I felt I wasn’t growing much in the church and the fellowship of other believers who share my passion for studying the Word deeply was sadly lacking. The other part of the reason was because I felt that some of the members couldn’t accept me as I am. Sadness incarnate.

I think 2005 has been an extremely difficult but quick year for me. Here I am, only one month old in my job and trying very hard to adjust myself to the system as well as coping with the workload. On the other side, there I was serving in the various ministries in church and trying to coordinate the meetings and logistics during the absence of the cell group leader(which was most part of the year)…and to add to that, trying to resolve the personal tension and conflicts between some members of the church.

To add salt to wound, my good intentions were misunderstood and deemed as “wanting to do it my way” or “being difficult”. Some wanted me to ‘change’ because I don’t ‘share my thoughts enough’ or because they think I am ‘unapprochable’. The funny thing is, the people who work with me 9 hours a day, 5 days a week or my close friends, don’t seem to agree with those statements. It’s only those people who only see me a few hours, once or twice a week who made comments like that. So who’s right here?

My personal point of view, I think this is just a clash of personality differences. We all are a little uncomfortable with people who are different from us and so we start all these pygmalion projects on others. Being an INFJ, my basic makeup as an introvert is something that I can't change. My quietness is not an expression of coldness but of my sincerity and seriousness of purpose. Usually when I am quiet, that means my mind is busy at work. My withdrawal from people is not because I am stuck up but rather a necessary escape valve for me, providing both time to rebuild my depleted resources and a filter to prevent the emotional overload to which I am so susceptible to.

I know one trait that is easily misunderstood by those who don’t really know me is that I am often unable to either hide or articulate any distress I may be feeling. Some may get irritated over my unexplained moodiness or as some call it ‘sulking’, only because I may be going through some personal problem which I ‘didn’t want to burden anyone with’. But those who are close to me usually takes the initiative to find out what’s the problem. Though some of them advise me that I should speak out….but then again, I can’t be telling everyone my problems right? Gosh, that would even make things more depressing!

I was actually reading this personality description of Eleanor Roosevelt …and I can like so identify with her. At least I know I am not alone in this world, though there’s only 1% of this personality type, making us the most rare of all types and typically difficult to understand.

Actually there is a theory devised by some INFJs on the ‘warm fuzzy teddybear’ feel that surrounds some of the introverted intuitives. This is how others usually see the INs:
INFJ – cold on outside, warm and fuzzy on the inside
INFP – warm and fuzzy inside and out
INTP – warm on the outside, hard as a rock inside
INTJ – cold and hard inside and out

It's worth mentioning since these observations seem to carry merit, but of course you have to remember that this theory doesn't necessarily apply to all or even most INs. If some of you are curious to find out what type of personality you are, you can take the Myer-Briggs test which although is not foolproof, is one of the quite accurate ones that I’ve tried.

Lastly, 2005 will also be remembered as the year I started blogging. A great innovation for us INFJs since our self-expression comes more easily on paper…or rather in writing!

Gifts, Gifts, Gifts....and more Gifts!

2005-12-27T21:47:00.000-08:00

It's that time of the year again where we exchange gifts with our friends and loved ones. Recently our young adults group had a Christmas get together and each one brought a gift to exchange with each other. I have always loved shopping for gifts, so given a budget of RM10, I went looking for a nice gift that can be unisex...after all what if a guy ends up getting a hairclip, what is he going to do with it? Start cross dressing?

We had a lot of fun guessing what were in those mysterious looking and shaped packages. One of them were wrapped in just plain white paper but in the shape of a rocket. Another was wrapped up in layers and layers...and layers of paper! Happy unwrapping!! And another was wrapped up nicely but I think weighed about 2 kilos. The host happily tossed it over to one of the guys and it dropped with onto his lap and 'kena' his more tender parts of the body...Ouch!!

If you guys are wondering what could have been that heavy...well wonder no more. He unwrapped it and Wala...looks like a big doll in a box...but wait what's that wrapped up in brown? It's.....Red Apples!! He and his family will be eating red apples for at least the next one month...haha!

And what did I get? I got a most lovely candle that I have ever seen. I love the engraving on the candle and it's so pretty! Being an artistic person, I just absolutely loved the decorative embellishments on the letters which formed the word "LOVE". It also had some texture on the background, creating an aged effect. Whoever it was who gave the candle, THANK YOU!!! I really love it. It still sits on my bedstand and I just don't have the heart to burn it. Looks like another addition to my already crowded decorative items collection!

We also had a round of games and this time we played charade. It was great fun trying to figure out all the weird actions and the one that win top prize was the "mosquito". So how do you show a mosquito? Just poke one of your fingers on your forearm...that's a "Mosquito"!!!

Last but not least, our group photo...here's the whole crazy gang....

The Deep Magic of Narnia

2005-12-26T19:33:00.000-08:00

I managed to catch the "Narnia" movie when I was back in Ipoh for my post Christmas holidays. Since I read the whole set of books many, many....many years ago, I can't really remember all the details but I know the gist of the story.

Actually when I first read the this particular book, the story kinda reminded me of the fairy tale called "Snow Queen". The story was about this evil Snow Queen and a couple. The Snow Queen kidnapped the boy and promised to make him king if he could piece together a mirror. The girl tried desperately to rescue him from the Snow Queen and in the end, as with fairy tales, they ended up together again destroying the evil Snow Queen.

So in this particular book of the Narnia chronicles, the Witch reminded me of the Snow Queen but of course the story ended up very differently. In fact as the story progressed with the appearance of Aslan the Lion, and his willing surrender to the Witch's intentions in Edward's stead, it started to remind me more and more of the Gospel story. Maybe because of that the movie touched my heart in more ways than one. I could still remember I started crying when I watched Aslan looking sad as he walked away into the night towards his death. My eyes were all red by the time they showed how he died.

In Narnia, the Deep Magic had decreed that all traitors' lives are forfeited to the Witch. If the Witch had looked back before the dawn of time, she would have learned that the Stone Table said that if any willing victim who had commited no crime or treachery was killed in a traitor's stead, the Table would crack and death would reverse itself.

So Aslan, knowing what was ahead of him, went quietly to the Witch's lair. Probably deriving strength from Susan and Lucy's company as he walks towards his death. And when he finally arrives, the witch shaved him of his glorious mane, bound him and killed him. Quietly led like a lamb, humbled and alone, he takes on Edward's punishment. And next early morn, we see the Stone Table cracked into two and Aslan alive and roaring again.

"At that moment they heard from behind them a loud noise—a great cracking, deafening noise as if a giant had broken a giant's plate.... The Stone Table was broken into two pieces by a great crack that ran down it from end to end; and there was no Aslan."

So in the same way, the Law has decreed that anyone who has commited sin in their life will be eternally separated from God unless there is a willing person who had commited no sin to die in their stead. Then only can the person's sin be forgiven and will live eternally with God in heaven.

So Jesus, knowing the bitter cup before Him, quietly went to the cruel cross. Deriving strength from time alone with His Father, He takes up the cruel cross. And the soldiers mocked, whipped and stripped him of His clothing. Lifted Him up high on the cross to die a slow painful death. Led quietly like a lamb, alone and disfigured, He takes on the sin of the world. And at the time when He gave up His Spirit, the curtain in the Most Holy place torn into two and three days later, Jesus appeared alive again to His disciples.

So eventhough Narnia have their 'Deep Magic', in this life with Jesus, we have an even 'Deeper Magic'!!

A Different Light at the Right Time

2005-12-25T21:48:00.000-08:00

I was still recovering from shock when I heard the news last night. I was following one of my friends to my church member's Christmas open house when she apologised that she didn't reply my sms earlier. Apparently she was in a daze cos Peggy, one of her friends was warded into ICU after a snatch thief tried to mug her.

It was only 2 days ago when Peggy was happily chatting with my friend's little daughter in the car as she followed us to watch the Christmas presentation in our church. Now she is in a coma due to internal bleeding from the incident. Sometimes we cry and ask God "Why God? WHY???" But we praise God that she is already a Christian so if God should say her time is up, at least we know she is in a better place.

I couldn't help but wonder, what if it was someone else who was not a Christian? What if that person had died? Did we do a good job in pointing this person to Christ during our Christmas presentation? Or was is just good entertainment? This Christmas season, God has really helped me see it in a different LIGHT. Christmas really isn't about Christmas trees or presents or Santa Claus....not even entertaining church presentations. Christmas isn't about 25 December. Christmas is about a God who loved us so much that He came down to live with us, eat with us and die for us. Are we living Christmas everyday of our lives? May we never forget what Christmas is really all about. Pray with me as we wait on God to heal Peggy. May she find healing in His wings.

Christmas in a different LIGHT

2005-12-25T01:57:00.000-08:00

“Joyful, joyful, Lord we adore Thee…..” I never thought I’d grow tired of hearing this line but after hearing for about a few thousand times these past few weeks as we practiced for our Christmas presentation I kinda had about enough for one year. We nearly panicked as the day drew closer but thanks to God for His blessing and providence, we did it….after all, like most typical Malaysians, most of the preparation was done quite last minute.

Being in charge of the hip hop dance number which was scheduled at the end of the show but was shifted to the beginning….at the very last minute….I had quite a number of challenges on the way to the final product. Initially I asked my dance instructor for help to choreograph the dance steps but due to both our busy schedule, we postponed it again and again. When we finally could find a time where we both could meet, he was suddenly down with high fever for a week!

My dancers couldn’t wait to get started already since we only had about three more weeks to go, so I had to pull my creative juices….and some of my hair as well to come up with the dance steps at least for the first part and meet up with my dance instructor later to help with the second part. The end product was a real ‘rojak’! I took parts from his dance steps which I felt was suitable and adjusted it to mine with a few suggestions from my dancers as well. Not bad considering that all of them are amateurs…You go girls!! Sunny, if you’re reading this, thank you so much for your time and help. You were a tremendous help….now you know why I couldn’t remember the steps for the first part…cos it’s all rojak…hey, you said it was okay for me to do that!!

I still remember the first night when the dancers ran out with their pom poms and started dancing, it was so exciting to see all that hard work come into fruition and everyone enjoyed the dance. Later, as we started the mime and slowly turned off all the lights till the audience could only see the moving white gloves which glowed in the UV lights, there were gasps of surprise and awe cos it was so unexpected.

We started with the choosing of the Christmas Tree scene and we didn’t realize it had such an impact on the audience until we heard one of the kids saying “Waliao!" His father was wondering where he learned to use that expression and credited it to the infamous ‘Waliao! Coconut Tree?’ scene. The highlight scene was the “fight” for the last present…what with all the kung fu/matrix- like action and light saber fighting, we really had the audience tickled pink. Santa Claus and kids were really memorable too….now kids know never to touch Santa’s beard cos…."Aaaaahhh!! It’s not real!!!!!"
The audience left with a little glow in the dark gift and hopefully a memorable message of what Christmas truly is about. And a BIG THANK YOU to all the people who made it happen...the stagehands, actors, narrator, cooks…everyone! I had fun preparing for this Christmas presentation despite of all its challenges….but might be another 10 years before I think we’d do something like this again!

All I Want for this Christmas is....

2005-12-23T00:23:00.000-08:00

This Christmas has really been a nostalgic one for me. I was window shopping these past few weeks for some Christmas gift ideas when I came upon Memory Lane the other day. What caught my eye was this little miniature wardrobe wrapped in bright, eye-catching colours. I was attracted to it and went in to take a closer look. It actually turned out to be a jewellery box shaped like a miniature wardrobe. It even has a little mirror inside and a turnstile inside one of the glass cabinets...to hang your necklaces in. Hmmm....good idea especially each time I take out my necklaces from my jewellery box, it all gets entangled and takes me forever to get them unentangled.

Then nostalgia came in....I still remember how I got my first jewellery box. I think I was about six or seven of age and my favourite grandma used to come visit once in a while especially during the Christmas holidays. That particular Christmas, she came to visit and gave me a jewellery box for Christmas. It was made of wood and beautifully inlaid with mother-of-pearl on the outside. When you open it, mirror panels lined the inside cover while a ballerina sprang up and danced to the tune of "Fur Elise". It even has a tiny key to lock the box up.

I think that was one of my favourite Christmas presents...ever! But after a few years, the jewellery box got spoiled, one of the mirrors cracked and though I tried, I couldn't repair it back. Come to think of it, I don't even know what happened to it now.

So suddenly looking at the beautiful jewellery box, my heart kinda yearned for another one this year. So I checked on the price....and it was a whooping RM60!! Hmmm...I don't think this is an extravagance I can afford right now. Maybe I can pray and hope that God would grant this wish of mine.....all I want for this Christmas is....a musical jewellery box!

I miss HOME!!!

2005-12-20T00:56:00.000-08:00

Maybe it's the Christmas ambience that makes you nostalgic and makes you think of home. Maybe it's been really that long since I went back to my hometown to spend time with my family. Or maybe it's because God has set eternity in our hearts and this longing for a place called HOME....a place where we feel where we really belong, which is in Heaven, at the feet of Jesus.

I woke up this morning and just had this longing for HOME. My housemates just moved out of my house this week and so I'm all alone in the house again. I kinda welcomed the stillness and solitude after coming home to a house full of people for the past one year. Always being surrounded by people the whole day, I really treasure the opportunity to be alone and recharge my energy. And yet at times, I wished that I didn't come home to an empty house but to a house of people I love and who loved me and are glad to see me come home....especially miss my dog, Leesha.

Why this unrest in my spirits? This longing to be HOME....the longing to just worship God the whole day....I love to sing and worship Him. This weariness of the daily grind, of putting up with the commuting stress. The longing to do something I really love instead of shuffling papers everyday. Gosh, I really don't want to grow old and become a cranky old lady but the lifestyle in KL here just have a way of making people become hostile and stressed out.

Why do we pay so much for "location" when the real value of a house isn't worth that much? I love to cook and entertain, and how I wish I had a house of my own, where I can open up my house and entertain guests, for visiting missionaries/friends, for my care group. I love to make music, but hardly have the time or energy to touch my musical instruments lately. I love to pursue knowledge and learn new skills, but don't have the financial resource nor the time....FRUSTRATION!!

Daddy, how long more? How my soul yearns for Thee, to be where You are....

Christmas Time!!

2005-12-18T00:46:00.000-08:00

It's Christmas time!!! My favourite time of the year. I love the ambience and the mood...the Christmas carols. The Christmas decorations...the whole works. I was at Mid Valley recently and they decorated the place really well. It kind of reminded me of some magical Christmas dreamland....something like the land of Narnia. I took some pictures of the landscaping but since my handphone camera wasn't very good, it didn't really do justice to it.

I really like the this one. It was like going into some sort of medieval castle....probably the Snow Queen's castle or something like that. Well, being an artistic person and pretty much a dreamer, I would have loved to do this kind of visual merchandising...if only just for fun. I love creating beautiful stuff and love to be surrounded by things of beauty.

Just going up into this little "fantasy architecture" just kinda makes you forget time and just for a while, it seems you are in another place, another time......

Fierce or Friendly?

2005-12-17T00:30:00.000-08:00

The calendar boy is finally out in print!! I took it to his class last weekend and teased him about looking so fierce. He quickly took the postcard and tried to hide from view cos there were two other members with him then who also teased him when they saw the postcard.

Haha...sorry lah. This is what you get when you pose for such publicity stunts. The photo really didn't do him justice and looked pretty fierce. Knowing him to be a pretty friendly guy, what you see is not what you get...
Even got him to sign it for "memories sake". He was reluctant...feeling very "pai seh". He didn't like the picture either even though it was pretty difficult posing for it and even got scolded. There were only 6 featured in the Dec issue of New Tide. I guess the rest will be coming next month and the New Icon Feb issue would have another version of the calendar as well.
Hmmm...I think the company is just trying to make a fast buck from us from this stunt. After all even people who can't read a word of chinese is buying the magazine becos of these hunks....good marketing strategy.

Guess What Junior Said Today … and maybe you wish he hadn't!

2005-12-11T22:57:00.000-08:00

Here's another hilarious article by Liz Curtis Higgs. Kinda like "Kids say the darnest things" and always good for a laugh. Enjoy!

Guess What Junior Said Today … and maybe you wish he hadn't!

Every mother thinks her offspring is hysterically funny. "You'll never believe what our four year old said," a woman in Topeka once assured me.

Oh, I'll believe it, all right.

I recently overheard my daughter, Lillian, phoning a friend. Her mother answered and asked Lillian if she wanted to leave a message—a new concept for my daughter.

"A message?" Lillian said, dumbfounded. "Okay. Tell her to put my foot in her prayers."

A big "Haaawwww!" slipped out of my mouth before I could stop it. (I've heard of putting your foot in your mouth, but in your prayers?)

"Mo-ther!" Lillian whined, stamping her foot. The same foot she'd supposedly hurt a week earlier, the one with the Ace bandage, the one she'd danced on seconds ago without so much as a wince. The foot we'd all prayed for without ceasing. That foot.

Kids are honest (sometimes painfully so), verbally courageous (or is that outrageous?), and very funny indeed.

As proof, here's what kids from all over America have to say about …

Discipline

A four-year-old girl and her younger brother were in their family room, jumping from the couch to the floor. Her daddy told them, "Stop that! You could get hurt."
As the parents listened from the kitchen, they heard their daughter proclaim in her preschool, know-it-all voice, "Come on, let's jump. Daddy doesn't spank very hard."

Cynthia and Greg have different disciplinary styles. He's the softie, she's the tough one. Boone, their two year old, wasn't happy with his mother's no-nonsense methods and kept calling, "Daddy! Daddy!"
Cynthia said sternly, "I don't want to hear you say Daddy one more time."
Boone took a deep breath and tried another approach. "Greg! Greg!"

Parents

On their way to church one Sunday evening, a couple's six-year-old daughter blurted out, "Mommy, do you and Daddy have sex?"
Before they could say a word, their eight-year-old son shot back, "Of course not! They're good Christian people."
Her father was attending a Promise Keepers conference, so five-year-old Nicollette and her mother went to an evening church service by themselves.
A friend inquired, "Nicollette, where's your daddy tonight?"
She proudly replied, "He's at Housekeepers!"

Siblings

When their second child arrived, Eric's parents had a gift ready for the six year old so he wouldn't be jealous of all the baby's presents. When the happy day arrived, the proud father presented Eric with a copy of James and the Giant Peach, inscribed: "Dear Eric, I'm so glad to have you as my big brother. I love you, Scott."
Eric turned to his parents with a look of understanding on his face. "That explains why he was in there so long. He had to write this whole book before he came out!"
Riding home from church one Sunday, Brooke, four, asked her grandparents for some chewing gum. "Do you know what I do with my gum when I get done chewing it?"
They expected an answer like, "Put it in the garbage," or "Throw it out the window." Nope.
"I give it to my baby brother, and he eats it!"

Manners

Chloe was three years old when she accompanied her mother, Christine, to a wedding shower at church. A month earlier, Christine had quit her job to stay home and her coworkers had given her many gifts, including a recipe holder for which she had no use.
Christine decided it would be a perfect gift for the newlyweds, so she wrapped it and took it to the party.
Chloe was sitting in her mother's lap when the bride-to-be opened their gift. In a loud voice, the little girl announced, "That used to be ours, but we didn't need it anymore!"

Church

It was Palm Sunday and, because of strep throat, Sue's three-year-old son had to stay home from church with a babysitter. When the family returned home carrying palm branches, he asked what they were for.
"People held them over Jesus' head as he walked by," his mother explained.
"Wouldn't you know it," the boy fumed. "The one Sunday I didn't go, he showed up!"
Cannon, three, was eager to show his mom what he learned in Sunday school. He pulled her over to the flannel board with all the animals paired two by two.
"See, Mommy?" he said. "Here's Noah in the dark."

Once you become a parent, there's no need to pray for humility—that's part of the job description. But other times, children toss verbal blessings our way when we least expect them. I was honored to win an award from my peers a few years back, and brought my family to the awards banquet.

The identity of the five award recipients was supposed to be a surprise, but Lillian took care of that. As people streamed by to their tables, she called out in her loudest voice, "My mom is winning a big award tonight!"

Ah, well. Who cares about the element of surprise? The joy shining in my daughter's eyes was enough for this mother. It makes up for many a too-honest comment like, "Gee, Mom, your tummy jiggles like Jell-O!"

Liz Curtis Higgs is a TCW columnist and the author of 12 books, including her latest, "While Shepherds Washed Their Flocks" and Other Funny Things Kids Say and Do (Nelson), from which this article was compiled.

Copyright © 1999 by the author or Christianity Today International/Today's Christian Woman magazine.

The Truth About Men (and why they don't require an instruction manual)

2005-12-06T21:57:00.000-08:00

I thought of inserting this hilarious article taken from the archives of "Today's Christian Women". The writer, Liz Curtis Higgs, is one of my favourite authors and she really knows how to tickle your laughing bones. I've always enjoyed reading her articles and thought of sharing this funny article in my blog. For more articles by her, you can check the archives of Today's Christian Women feature column, Life with Liz or Lighten Up.

The Truth About Men (and why they don't require an instruction manual)

After 13 happy years of marriage, I'm here to report that men are embarrassingly easy to understand.

That's a blessing, considering when you hit 30, you're trying to figure out who you are. When you reach 40, you spend your days mind-melding with a teenager; at 50, you begin to wonder whatever happened to the aging parent you thought you knew.

Realizing women could handle only so many unanswered questions, God graciously gave us fathers, brothers, sons, husbands, and/or beaus who don't require a basic instruction manual. In fact, men will tell you exactly what they think—if you just ask them. Amazing!

So, after long observing my handsome hubby, Bill, I've at last discovered The Truth About Men.

Men Prefer Simple Meals
Bill came home from the grocery store with a sack filled entirely with small styrofoam boxes.

I peered in the bag. "What are those?"

"Lunch." He pulled one out and held it up proudly.

Sure enough, that was the name on the label: "Instant Lunch." Some were with shrimp. Others were with chicken. Each one, he soon discovered, came with heartburn. Did he expect it to be edible? No, he expected it to be easy. Fill the cup with boiling water (a male specialty) and stand back for three minutes. Find spoon. Eat.

A woman would never dream of consuming such a thing for lunch. Because it's not real food? No, because it's 290 calories for 14 ounces.

Men Never Waste Food

When Bill and I married and merged our households, I discovered he didn't own a single storage container, Tupperware® or otherwise.

"What did you use to store leftovers, honey?"

His forehead wrinkled. "Leftovers?"

Men have a no-survivors approach to food. If it's there, it's to be eaten. Driving home from an exhausting trip east, we gulped down our fast-food meals in the car. Hours later, as midnight approached, Bill suddenly popped some thing in his mouth.

I asked a legitimate question. "What was that?"

"A french fry. I thought it fell on the floor, but hey, it was right here in my lap."

Lovely.

Then he started chewing. Even in the darkened car, I could sense there was a problem.

"Uh … I don't think this is a french fry," he mumbled. "Do you have a napkin?"

I did have a napkin, which neatly disposed of the hunk of plastic wrap from his new CD which, to be honest, didn't look, feel, or smell anything like french fries. Ever.

Men Are Afraid of Cellular Phones

It was Bill's idea to get a cell phone in the first place. For my safety and his peace of mind, he insisted.

"We get only 30 free minutes a month with this thing," he warned. "No idle chit-chat."

That's like telling me, "Here's a fresh chocolate cake," then not giving me a fork. Cruel and unusual punishment.

The first time I called him on the cell phone, I found out he meant zero chit-chat.

"Hey, sweetie!" I sang out after I punched in the numbers on my new toy."I'm heading home."

"Good. See you soon." Click.

I soon learned I had to plan my conversation in advance so I could squeeze everything in my allotted 15 seconds per call.

If I went 30 seconds, I could hear Bill sweating. If I chatted for a full minute, he started gasping for air as horrifying visions of $100 cellular phone bills spun through his mind.

When the first statement came, Bill opened it with trembling hands, obviously expecting the worst. But of the 30 minutes per month he'd paid for, we'd used exactly 4.

Men Consider Dumpster Diving an Olympic Sport

Some men build muscles with a home gym, while others—such as my Bill—develop buns of steel while carrying home other people's castoffs on trash pickupday.

Bill's theory is, why pay for something at a yard sale when you can claim the stuff people leave on the curb for free? Discarded computer equipment, outdated stereo rejects, black-and-white tv sets with tubes—these sorry has-beens disappear into the black hole of his van, to be spirited off to the garage when I'm not home.

Bill would never do such a thing when I'm with him, you understand. He knows the minute he got out of the vehicle, I would drive away, disavowing any knowledge of his tightwad self. Proof positive that men and women are—forgive the pun—wired differently. Women think, People threw those items out for a reason: They're broken. Men think, People threw them out for me to fix.

My only recourse was to institute a 2-year rule: If Bill hasn't repaired an absconded item within 24 months, out to the curb it goes. Within hours,the thing vanishes, meaning another man is now building his biceps lugging off our useless treasures. Like a forlorn Christmas fruitcake, this tasteless trash moves from house to house, untouched but appreciated. By the men, anyway.

Men Question the "Neatness Counts" Rule

Before we were married, Bill's friends warned him, "Liz is a neatnik, "which explains why, when he invited me over to his apartment for the first time, he announced with pride, "I found the floor!"

"Oh my," I murmured. "I didn't know you could lose such a thing." Silly me. Men can lose sight of any flat surface within hours. Library books, junk mail, tools—if it doesn't roll off or melt, it inevitably covers every level area of our home.

Good news: no wood to dust.

Bad news: nowhere to put my stuff.

Men Have Very Basic Wardrobe Needs

If I let him get away with it, Bill would wear the identical pair of pants and his favorite red golf shirt every day of his life. Yes, they'd get washed, of course, but only at night while he's sleeping, so they're ready to wear the next morning.

This requires that I shop on his behalf, then hide his new clothes in unexpected places, like the closet, for rotation purposes. When it's time to throw something out, I've learned tossing it in the wastebasket brings my grown man close to tears. Instead, I simply pack the done-for duds in my suitcase when I leave town on business, then quietly deposit them in an airport trash receptacle.

I know I'm not alone in this. I've seen women slip torn sweats, defunct sneakers, even ragged unmentionables, into trash cans at O'Hare International. We do what we have to do, girls.

Bless their grooming-impaired hearts. What can one expect from guys who do their nails with a Swiss army knife?

Men Secretly Long for Commitment

Everyone knows that a married man lives longer than a single one does (it's been proven clinically, or at least by Ann Landers), but married men are more willing to die. That's why they need us—their mother, daughter, wife, or girlfriend—to give them a reason for pressing toward the upwardcall.

After years of wedded bliss with my Bill, I've learned the hidden truth of his fidelity to me: I'm the only woman who loves him enough not only to match his socks, but knot them together; who cares so deeply for his social comfort that I lay out his Sunday clothes at the end of the bed like a little flat person; and who finds his occasional odd sounds and snorts almost cute. Almost.

The truth about men is they're funny, which is reason enough to keep one handy and happy for a while. Yea, for a lifetime, beloved.

—LIZ CURTIS HIGGS is the author of 12 books, including Mixed Signals (Multnomah), her first novel. A conference and retreat speaker, Liz lives with her family in Kentucky.

Copyright © 1999 by the author or Christianity Today International/Today's Christian Woman magazine.

No, Thank You!

2005-11-30T00:13:00.000-08:00

I was on my way back home on the commuter last night when I saw this amusing incident involving two malay girls and one male foreigner.  I was actually standing near this cubicle near the doors since there were no more seats available.  These two malay girls were standing next to each side of the door and chit chatting.  Then this guy, quite fair, probably from north India or Nepal judging from his way of speech, came out to stand next to one of the girls, leaning against the wall.  As the commuter train rattled along its way, suddenly the girl looked back at the guy because he was standing closer and closer to her.  He quickly apologized and moved away abit.

The train rattled quite violently later and he was kinda pushed towards her, whether on purpose or not, I’m not too sure but so he quickly apologized again and this time went over to stand over the other side next to the other girl.  He then started talking to the other girl and the conversation went something like this:

Boy: Excuse me, is the next stop Jalan Templer?
Girl: Yes.
Boy: What your name?
Girl: Sha*****…And you?
Boy: My name is Ra***.

Boy: What your handphone number?
Girl: No, thank you!

Girl: Are you getting down at Jalan Templer?
Boy: Yes I stop at Jalan Templer station.

At this time the train was already reaching Jalan Templer station, so she wished him goodbye.  He wished her back and started walking out of the train, waving back at them.  When the train moved on, the two girls were giggling and laughing away over his antics.

I felt like laughing too, but seriously what was he thinking….that Malaysian girls are easy?  But I must say this, he had guts! Like the saying goes “Faint heart never won Fair lady”…or something like that.  Back in 2000 I had an encounter with a guy who really had guts too.  I was working in a Christian organization and had to go to the bank about 3 to 4 times a week.  Since we had a priviledge account, I went to this counter where there were only 3 tellers there, 2 malay girls and 1 malay guy.  So in time we were quite friendly with each other.  One day, the malay guy asked me if I was interested in their insurance programme.  The conversation went something like this:

Guy: Are you interested in our new insurance program (handing me a brochure)?
Me: No, I already have a policy.
Guy: How about your parents?
Me: They also bought already.
Guy: Your ‘Pakwe’?
Me: No-lah, he’s in New Zealand.
Guy: New Zealand?  So far.  So…em…you guys not getting married?
Me: (speechless for a while)…em..no.

I quickly finished the transaction and went back without a word.  What actually happened was, out my “dumb dumbness” I didn’t really know the meaning of ‘Pakwe’.  I thought since it sounded like ‘Pak Cik’, he must be referring to my uncle or something.  I had no idea it was a malay slang word for boyfriend.  So since I was too embarrassed to admit my ‘dumb dumbness’, I didn’t straighten it out nor see any need to.

Then the next time I went to the counter, as he was processing my transaction, he asked me when I was free.  I asked why and he said he wanted to take me out to dinner.  Still recovering from the initial shock, I just kept quiet.  Thinking my silence meant that I didn’t want to go, so he tried to persuade me some more and said that it’s okay, since my ‘pakwe’ is in New Zealand, what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.

“Oh really…hmmm, this guy cannot to be trusted! So that day was just to check out if I had a boyfriend and not because he wanted to sell me insurance…”

So in the end, just to give him face(I mean, hey it took a lot of guts for him to ask me out in front of his colleagues and all the other customers), I told him I would go out with him but under one condition.  And the condition was that he has to bring along his two other female colleagues.  He was reluctant, citing that they eat a lot and he would “rugi”.  So I said to him that it is up to him.  I’m not saying no, but if he wants to go out with me, I made it very clear that it is just as friends and not a date.  Since he is a non-Christian, he was not even an option for me….even if he is, well…I don’t trust him, even though he really had guts!

It was MAGIC!

2005-11-20T17:34:00.000-08:00

The screams and laughter of children echoed throughout the waiting hall. Parents chatted noisily while making sure their children kept out of trouble from the corner of their eyes. I just watched them in amusement and felt like a little kid again. Nope, I wasn't in a kindergarten or in a children's centre. I was actually in the waiting hall of the "Panggung Bandaraya" waiting for the Black Art Theatre presentation of "Thumbelina"

We went in about 10 minutes before the show started and I happened to sit down next to a semi-retired lady who happens to be a freelance drama and speech teacher for kids. She also gives sessions for those who needs coaching in voice projection and public speaking. We chatted while waiting for the show to start and I even invited her for our Christmas presentation which is also using the same black light effect (see below my cbox for more info), which was the main reason why I'm attending this "Thumbelina". She used to attend a baptist church back in Penang and now she's staying in KL and attending a 7000 plus Roman Catholic church. She believes she is a Christian becos she was born into a Christian family....hmmm...EEians, I have her contact if you need a it *wink*

The show started off with a blue bird flying in the air and dropped something that bloomed into "Thumbelina". The effect was just magical. Watching the flower open up and "Thumbelina" emerging from the flower....it was like watching some computer graphic animation. There was classical music playing throughout the entire show creating the exact atmosphere during the suspenseful scenes and the peaceful ones. I think most were taken from Tchaikovsky's ballet pieces cos I remember them playing one of the movements from "The Nutcraker". The props and characters were very flexible and colourful. They also floated around quickly creating a fantasy-like effect.

It was only an hour presentation becos the kids were already getting restless, though didn't notice any of the kids getting scared in the dark. When the show finished, the switched on all the lights and the all the stagehands came out. Guess how many of them were there???? Only four!!! Looking at all the props that has to be handled, it came as a big surprise that only four of them handled everything. They were dressed all black from neck to toe, even their hands were in black gloves. One of them asked the kids, "Do you wanna see the puppets" All the kids, me included..hehe...cried out with a resounding "YES!!!" I managed to take some photos with my handphone but it didn't turn out very well. Anyone care to donate a digital camera *hint!hint!* Mainly because the kids were crowding around in awe of the puppets and could hardly get a nice pose out from them so all of them were candid shots. Click on to my photoblog to have a look!

Is that You God?

2005-11-19T22:14:00.000-08:00

If you have been reading the newspapers lately, they seem to be highlighting a lot of plights regarding transexuals. Another article came out today which you can read here about how a transexual alleged that she was humiliated and forced to strip in front of three policemen after being detained for suspected vice. And all this happening right after the "infamous couple" incident.

I'm beginning to wonder
..."Is that You God? Are You trying to say something to the Church?"
I actually went to the bookstore to find out how does the Church in general address this issue on gays and transexuals and reaching out to them. And what about gay churches? I was actually quite surprised that I couldn't find any...or maybe I was looking in the wrong bookshop.

Well, this issue has been around since Noah's time so why so hard to find a book that addresses this issue....maybe God is asking the Church and maybe specifically the Malaysian Church to wake up and do something about it. What say You God?

RM 1 Million Dollar Wedding (Part II)...Go ahead, throw the first stone!

2005-11-16T18:44:00.000-08:00

Just saw another article on the 'infamous couple' this morning and was feeling a little outraged.

Transsexual drama queen?? Sinful couple??

Who gave these people the right to condemn them? Who do they think they are? God? My anger is not because he is my friend, but the at the judgemental attitude of society. Too often we are ready to accuse others unjustly of wrongdoing. We fail to see that we, ourselves, are guilty of sins. Judging is necessary in life, but it must be done fairly. Even as we judge, so we shall be judged (Matthew 7: 2). Sometimes, our motives for judging are for improper purposes. Putting someone down makes us feel superior but it is actually a manifestation of pride. When we enjoy besmirching another, we become "stone throwers" and we lose grace.

If you look in the Bible at passage (John 8:1-11), Jesus didn't condemn sinners but extended outrageous grace.

The scene is the temple courts where Jesus was teaching. The Pharisees, unable to get the ushers to get rid of Jesus for his purported blasphemy, decided to take matters into their own hands by way of a sting. They bring to Jesus a woman caught in adultery and made her stand in front of everybody. That meant she was caught in bed with a man who was not her husband and by at least two witnesses given the high burden of proof Deuteronomy 17 demands in such a case. Basically, she was a dead duck; though you have to wonder: What happened to the guy? Did he somehow manage to escape? Or was this simply the ancient double standard on display? Of course since this was an engineered trap, the Pharisees may have let the guy off with a handshake, thanking him for his assistance, the woman being no more than their disposable pawn.

The Pharisees presented their clear cut case. A woman caught in the act. The law unambiguous. Leviticus 20 states: “If a man commits adultery with another man’s wife, both the man and the woman must be put to death.” Now you’ll note that that the law clearly implicates the man in such cases too. Since both had to be present for any sentencing to occur, it was fully within Jesus’ prerogative to let the woman off on a technicality. But this was a kangaroo court. The Pharisees’ intent was to force Jesus into a no-win decision. Capital punishment was the sole prerogative of the Roman government. To advocate stoning would violate the law of Rome. But to absolve the woman would violate the law of Moses. What would Jesus do?

The crowd leaned in. Everyone knew Jesus had an incurable soft spot for the disreputable of society, even to the point of eating dinner at their houses. There was also his long-running feud with the religious leaders. He had proven completely indifferent to their interpretations of the law thus far. Would he do so again? How could he be indifferent to a blatant A-felony sin?

It appeared the Pharisees had him cornered. The smart thing to do would be to keep your mouth shut; which Jesus initially did. He simply stooped down and started doodling in the dirt. What an odd thing to do. It’s the only instance we have of Jesus writing anything, which of course has led to all sorts of guesses as to what it was he wrote.

But what Jesus wrote not only can’t be known, it’s not important. What is important here is that he wrote with his finger. Whether the Pharisees would have picked up on it or not, Jesus symbolically signaled that He as God incarnate is the author of the law.

Not that anybody cared about this here. All anybody cared about here was a verdict. So Jesus gave them one. He went with the law: “Go ahead and stone her....BUT...let those who have never sinned throw the first stone.” In one fell swoop, Jesus forced their attention away from the woman’s sin and onto their own. In doing so Jesus exposes our own deceptive tendency to criticize and disparage the faults of others as a way of exonerating ourselves.

One by one, beginning with the oldest, the crowd dissipated leaving Jesus alone with the woman. “Has no one condemned you?” He asked. And she replied, “No one.” Jesus declared, “neither do I. Go and sin no more.” This is an astounding turn of events. From being caught in adultery, shamefully dragged out into the public square, humiliated before the entire community, your sin displayed for all to see, threatened with execution, your fate resting upon a reputably righteous man who would have no choice but to find you guilty—only to have him pull off some unbelievably clever verbal judo that disperses your accusers after which he says go home and don’t let it happen again. Wow!

Given Jesus’ reputation as soft on sinners, this passage can be read like some permissive parent’s reaction to a child who’s done horribly but is simply loved too much to punish harshly. Jesus lets you go as long as you promise to be a good girl. While this is unbelievably good news for the sinner, it stinks for her betrayed husband and family. And how can Jesus forgive her so freely?

This is the outrageous nature of God’s grace. While forgiveness is free, it is not without cost. There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, but there is obligation. In Romans 8 Paul also wrote, “If the Spirit of God who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will give life to your mortal bodies also through his Spirit that dwells in you. Therefore because of this, brothers and sisters, you are indebted, under obligation.”

“Go and sin no more.”

But how do you do that? It’s an obligation you can’t keep; a debt you can’t ever pay. Therefore grace enslaves you in service to God. Freed from sin, grace binds you to Jesus. You have been bought at a price, the price of Christ himself, you now belong to Him—His Spirit in you giving you the power to follow His ways. For the adulterous woman I’d like to think this meant she not only repented but went on to attempt amends with her husband. It may be very difficult to restore that trust again. But grace obligates you to do whatever it takes to try. I’d like to think that the woman did that.

Even though I may not approve of what they did because of my beliefs in following the standards set in the Bible, as recipients of God's grace, we’re still not free to judge and condemn, even if our cause seems just. After all, I am also a sinner saved by grace, no better than the rest. We must be prepared to extend grace and help people who are ignorant of many things in life as Jesus did here.

RM 1 Million Wedding (Part I)

2005-11-15T16:51:00.000-08:00

A recent article came out in The Star tabloid regarding a couple who spent about RM 1 million ringgit on their wedding. Now this was no ordinary wedding...the bride happens to be a man who underwent three major surgeries in order to be a woman and the groom happens to be.................... my ex-schoolmate! For the full article, just click here

Imagine my shock when I saw the photo and article. Hmmm...didn't know he had it in him to love someone so much, he proposed six times to her(him?). I used to see him in school back in Form 6. He even dated my classmates before...ahem, they happened to be females. He's quite a good looking guy and though I've lost touch with him now, he used to join my class when we went out for group outings.

He's actually a quiet guy and also quite active in sports, but I didn't really knew him very well. I can still remember the time he came to persuade me from quitting as a librarian. What happened was when I started my Lower 6 Form, I joined the Double Maths class since the thought of cutting up frogs to see their heart beating just totally freaked me out. So since Biology was out and I was in the Science stream all along, I didn't have other options left. Then when I failed my Mid-term Double Maths paper, I started to panic, cos this was the first time I ever failed a school exam. I was already elected as a librarian then, and after that panic attack, I decided to quit and he, being the head librarian, approached me to persuade me from quitting. He gave me a few reasons why I should continue to be a librarian but I was unconvinced. I think he wasn't convinced by his own reasons as well, cos a few weeks later, he also handed in his badge....he probably talked to me out of duty rather than conviction....haha!

Yesterday another article came out in the same tabloid saying that the Government and the Church in Malaysia do not recognise the marriage as valid because of the bride's gender. Looks like this is a start of a challenging marriage. Will they come out of it in one piece? Well, whatever the outcome is, I pray that they get what is best for them.

Calendar boy

2005-11-13T17:29:00.000-08:00

The long queue snaked along the walkway outside Espanda club and it was only 8pm. At the entrance the organisers were busy giving away doorgifts and free drink coupons. Behind the stage, 30 nervous young men were getting ready for the final round of interview. Inside the club, it was already jam packed with people waiting impatiently for the event to start. There was hardly any standing space left and yet people were pushing their way through to get a better view of the stage while the long queue kept getting longer outside.

Finally there were lots of cheering and wolf whistles, the young men were coming out to do the catwalk. Dressed in jeans and body hugging white T-shirt with "I'm A Hunk" printed in front, to show off their muscular bodies, all 30 of them looked liked cover-guy models vying for the title of....New Icon/New Tide's latest 12 Hunks of the Year 2005.

In between interviews, there was also a special presentation from our Malaysian Idol, Daniel as well as a fashion show with some local and foreign models together with Amber Chia. Just click here for the write up in The Star newspaper.

A group of us from my gym were among the crowd cheering them on....of course each of us having our particular favourites. My cardio dance instructor was the first contestant. So he was the first one to be interviewed. They asked him to use his smile and friendly disposition to approach the emcee so that he can be the model for the "Tough" jeans. Not knowing what to do, he decided to pull the guy's jeans to show how tough "Tough" jeans really is. Not alot of people understood what he was trying to do...but it's ok cos finally he did won. After the event, the 12 finalists took of their shirt and had a private photo shoot together...if I'm not mistaken I think they took it on the bed???

My instructor finally got to be one of the calendar boy for New Icon/New Tide's 2006 calendar, expected to be out by February 2006. The photo shoot for the calendar was on the following day and he told us how difficult it was to twist his body to the exact pose that the photographer wanted....even got scolded! Hmmm...not easy being a model...even a temporary one. Well, looking forward to see how the pictures turn out in the calendar.

PlanetShakers in Malaysia again

2005-11-10T22:30:00.000-08:00

Been too busy to go for the Planet Shakers Conference...aiyah, what to do, so many things going on and with Christmas coming. Sometimes I wonder whether we are doing too much. After all God must have a reason for giving us only 24 hours in a day. While we try to accomplish more with the time we've been given, sometimes we wish we have a 48-hour day.

Hmm...does it seem surprising that Jesus never rushed anywhere and yet was always on time and accomplished a lot of things??

Anyway, found a sneak preview of what's happening over there...wish I was there. Wish you were there but can't, just click on

N ª R r Ø w ª Y ¿

Hey, tonight's the last night if you can make it....

To do or die??

2005-11-10T00:57:00.000-08:00

Woo hoo!! After much thought, I finally managed to get my death wishlist done....sounds so morbid...haha! Or rather a list of things to do before I die. Not that I'm thinking of dying now but it's a good practice to step back and take a look at what you want to do with your life, what you want to achieve and whether we are going that direction right now. Here's 25 items, well actually there was more but at this point 25 is sufficient. So here goes...

Things to do before I die
Lead as many as possible to heaven...hey since I'm going there, might as well show the way
Fulfill my God-given purpose in life
Leave a legacy
Fall in love unconditionally...to the right man (God needs to help me out here cos I don't trust my heart)
Have my first kiss at the marriage altar
Bungee jumping!!!
Skydiving...people must think I'm an adrenaline junkie
Start an orphanage
Make a difference in someone's life
Take a cruise around the world
Go up in a hot-air balloon
Own a house by the beach and spend time making it into what I want
Write a novel
Paint my self-portrait
Cut my own album
Teach someone illiterate to read
Perform in front of a live audience at MPO...hey, a girl can dream, can't she?
Spend a vacation in an exotic location
Get a degree or PhD...not permanent head damage mind you
Learn how to fly a plane
Publish my own magazine
Get my body into optimum shape
Learn how to write my name in 50 languages...pretty few considering there are about over 6,000 languages in the world
Help make the world a better place for children
Learn to scuba dive at Australia's Great Barrier Reef

Phew!! Looking at the list, I think I'll need two lifetimes to accomplish all that. I don't think I'll be able to do everything...but then again, nothing is impossible with God. After all Life is a dance and God is the Lord of my dance.

Guess who I saw and what I see?

2005-11-09T00:30:00.000-08:00

My friend invited me over for a movie with her last night at a shopping mall nearby. I agreed and took a bus to the mall to meet her. Since it was peak hour, the bus was slowly getting crowded and the roads were also beginning to get jammed. Then I saw two young guys dressed in white shirts and black pants got onto the bus. They were holding some brochures and what looked like bibles.

Being familiar with their 'costume', my guess was they were either JWs or Mormons. Since there wasn't any seat left, they stood during the ride but I could see them 'surveying' the passengers in the bus and finally one of them sat down next to an elderly man when there was a seat available. He quickly struck up a conversation with the man and started sharing about his beliefs.

Later the other guy did the same with a younger guy who sat in front of me. I kinda eavesdropped on what he was sharing and I heard him say that their 'bible' is a little different than the 'holy bible' and they want to share what they believe to be the 'truth'.

When I heard that, the thought ran through my mind, "Why should your Bible be a little different than the Holy Bible?" Indirectly they are saying the Holy Bible isn't the truth and theirs is the "truth".

But what I saw that day is two guys working for their "salvation" because they believe their salvation is earned by works. That is the "truth" that they believe. What the Holy Bible tells us is that "salvation is by grace"....but sadly those who is "saved by grace" seldom "work out their salvation". We are saved to do "work that is set out for us" but we seem to take it for granted. Are we doing the work we are supposed to be doing? Are we sharpening the tools we have been given?

Although I do admire how these two guys intentionally going out to "save" people, they are preaching a different "Jesus" than what the Holy Bible portrays. To me, many different 'gospels' and many different kinds of 'Jesus' can be preached, but only the Jesus portrayed in the Holy Bible is truly unique. Jesus, the son of God, came to save us cause no one else could and so that no one else can boast that they "worked" their way to heaven.

Time for spring cleaning....for the soul (Part II)

2005-11-06T23:48:00.000-08:00

Today I managed to call the personal empowerment contact person that my boss passed to me. Right now I need to pray for God to provide the resource and opportunity to attend the workshop. Hmmm...didn't realise that this kind of workshop can cost RM888!! It's supposed to be at Mont Kiara for a weekend but only food is provided, not a stay-in workshop. It should be sometime before the end of the year. She just needs at least 10 people to start the workshop but right now she only has about 4 people interested.

Gosh! I really need to work out my budget....what with Christmas coming and all. Time to get a little creative again this Christmas?? Do I have the time??!! Time is such a precious commodity to me....sigh. I need to MAKE TIME!! Just have time to start getting in touch with my soul again by making this simple list:

What makes me happy:
Dancing and singing in the rain!
Puppies and dogs...love to watch them sleep and eat
Making music...on my piano, violin, guitar...anything!!
Playing with children especially toddlers
The joy of sharing and seeing someone receive Christ
Thinking back of the time when I first discovered the way to heaven is free
Feeling and smelling the fresh crisp sheets of newly changed bedsheets
Watching the night sky and singing praise songs at 1am in the morning
Discovering a rainbow in the sky
Smelling the fresh air after a heavy rainfall
Giving and receiving presents!
Chatting and spending some light hearted moments with my friends
The look of a child when she discovers something new/exciting.
Walking on the beach
Snuggling in bed on a rainy day
Cheese....anything from mozarella to cheddar
Chocolate...anything from ice-cream to frapuccino.
A good haircut...and a hairdresser
Watching a good comedy
The feeling I get after a good workout.

Hmm....20 items...not bad for starters. This list is actually things I've done or experienced before. Some might think I must be crazy...but what the heck, it makes me happy and it's not illegal...hehe! Maybe the next list I should do is "What do I want to do before I die"....gotta find time for that.

Time for spring cleaning....for the soul (Part I)

2005-11-05T22:41:00.000-08:00

Finally had some time do some spring cleaning during the deeparaya holidays. Man...do my room need a spring cleaning!!! I've just threw out 5 bags of rubbish and my room still looks cluttered with so much stuff...what to do, I like to keep stuff *sigh*. Actually it took me 3 days to finally finish cleaning my room...hehe, had to stop halfway to meet up with friends and other activities. Now I only need to find time to clean my bathroom...

As I was going through my stuff, I remember this saying I heard from "dunno where" that

The state of our room reflects the state of our soul

....hmmm....i don't know what credentials the person who said this had, but I reflected on it and I think there is some truth to it. Just looking around my room with stacks of half-finished books and papers strewn around, my piano and violin lying there untouched for "dunno how long"....it kinda reflects my soul too. Too busy rushing here and there, doing this thing and that, I think I kinda neglected the "important but not urgent" things of life...like the "Tyranny of the Urgent" we run around doing the urgent but not so important things but the important but not so urgent things get pushed aside.

Before my boss left, she did my appraisal. During the appraisal, she asked me this simple question,

"Am I in touch with my feelings?"

I told her simply, "No, I'm not." And then I started to feel my tears filling up my eyes. And I started to realise that she has a point. I'm so out of touch with my feelings that I don't really know what really makes me happy or why do I feel the way I do anymore. In the working world, where everything is impersonal, we just have to "push aside" our feelings and put up that "professional front". And when 101 things needs your attention right now, you just don't have that time to "smell the roses", so to speak. So my boss encouraged me to attend a personal empowerment workshop and gave me the contact person's number.

Last night as I sat down to do my QT and was praying, this song just came to my mind.

Draw me close to You,
Never let me go....
...help me find the way,
Bring me back to You.

And when I read the lyrics, I just started crying. The lyrics just spoke what I couldn't say. I've been so busy with so many things crowding my attention and time, I think He was pushed aside without me even realising it. When I finally realised just how far away I've gone....I don't know where to begin to find the way back to Him.

But I know that His love endures forever and He will never let me go.

Spikey hair should be banned from cinemas!!!

2005-11-04T22:30:00.000-08:00

Aaaaarrgh!! I just had to let it out. I finally had some free time to watch a movie during the deeparaya holidays so I decided to watch Zorro 2. Everything was fine until this guy with spikey hair walked in and sat right in front of me. Not only was he tall, when he sat up, his hair was blocking half the screen!!! The cinema was pretty crowded so there wasn't an empty place around for me to move to.

Can you imagine the frustration when I had to keep bobbing my head left, right and above his head to see the screen? I was so tempted to flatten out that hair in front of me!! Why do guys nowadays have to have this spikey hairstyle? Hope it goes out of style soon or cinemas better start implementing a ban on spikey heads to enter the cinema. They are an obstruction to others and hazardous to the owner....someone might get hurt you know. Maybe get their eyes poked out by the spikes or someone decided to do something drastic about that visual obstruction in front of him...who knows...

Another beauty contest again...for males!!

2005-10-24T23:39:00.000-07:00

My dance instructor is up to it again. Another "beauty contest for males"...and this time he has to do it without his shirt on!! This is the requirement, in case you think I'm putting "gambar lucah" on my blog...:-P

Actually my colleague commented that he looks better with his shirt on...haha! When I asked him what were the majority of the comments, he said most of his friends said he looked like a small kid. Come to think of it, yeah...he does and in fact, out of the 30 finalists, he was the only one who smiled...a little.

How he ended up smiling while the rest didn't was actually because he couldn't keep himself from smiling. The photographer was telling him to hold back the smile and that made him smile....and SNAP!! Personally I think it's better that he does. Most of them looked so fierce and unapproachable.

But the most ironic thing was, one of the prize sponsors was the gym he left. And now he is tied to their competitor...what a scenario!! My gang at the gym already agreed that we will vote for him...so see how it goes in the November finals.

Well, if you like what you see, you can check out the full page version in NewTide/NewIcon (October 05 issue) and also check out the rest of the contestants..^^

P/s: For more comments and pix, click here.

Getting older....but am I wiser?

2005-10-20T10:40:00.000-07:00

It's that time of the year again where I start counting how many candles I have on my birthday cake. Every year the candles increase in number doesn't it....hehe....doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out. Well I've finally reached the big 3-0 and I took the week off to reflect back just where have I been, where I am and where am I going to. What do I really want out of life?

Well, it was at this age that Jesus started His public ministry and died 3 years later when His work was done. Pity that He died at the prime of His life, some may say but I look at it and wonder, can I complete my purpose in my generation by 3 years time? What is my purpose in my generation? I look at myself and think, "Man, I still have a long way to go!"

My young adults group leader "volunteered" me to be the "sitting duck" in their "target practice" today. Hmm...not a practice everyone would like to do on their birthday. The main reason he wanted to do that was to give a chance for the people in the group to air their complaints, comments and compliments about me and I have a chance to defend, explain myself, all for the purpose of building good relationships within the group. Some of the things they said was not easy medicine to take especially knowing I've hurt some people unknowingly but generally they do understand where I'm coming from and how I work.

I'm not perfect and as God blesses me with more years to my life, I will strive to increase in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and man" (Luke 2:40,52 KJV)
My young adults group finally surprised me with a chocolate ice cream birthday cake (yummy...my favourite!! thanx guys!) and even took a picture of it...haha. Yup, "Charlie", this is definitely a birthday I will not forget ;)

Another Farewell...

2005-10-13T18:22:00.000-07:00

Today is a sad day for me. I have to say farewell to a good friend, mentor and supervisor. Even though she is my boss, she is much more than that to me. What can I say....I pray that she will find what she's looking and hoping for. May her path be blessed and God watch over her always.

Our staff got together to get her the beautiful saree she is wearing. She said she will always treasure it and can bring it with her wherever she goes. Hmm...when she goes back to US to be together with the one she loves one day.

Always an encourager and epitome of excellence in whatever she does, farewell to a well loved friend.

Too Cute To Eat

2005-10-04T01:26:00.000-07:00

My colleague just came back from Disneyland and was passing out these candies. They are these sugar coated gummies with sugar icing decorated on them to make them look like cartoon characters. There are four different types.

She passed one to me....it's still on my table. Too cute to eat lah...

I won an Ipod Shuffle!!

2005-09-30T18:33:00.000-07:00

I still can't believe that I won an Ipod Shuffle!! This is the first time I actually won anything in a lucky draw. This lucky draw was conducted during my company annual dinner recently at Sunway Lagoon Resort Hotel. The theme for the dinner was "International Gala Spectacular" so we were supposed to dress up in any costume that represents a country...like Statue of Liberty, Geisha, etc... There was even a RM500 prize for the best dressed male and female staff.

Hmm...I actually contemplated dressing up but then again, no lah, too much work, not enough time. The winner for the female category was a staff dressed up as Princess Pei Pei from China, while the male category is ....actually i felt it was abit out of topic but the guy actually dressed as a lady while his wife dressed as a man. Creative idea but abit out of topic. Oh well, he won anyway. Both of them were supposed to dress up like that when they come to work on Monday or they'll forfeit the title...do you think they did?? Actually I didn't think it was serious, so they didnt...haha!

We also had a very impressive Capoiera Dance performance. It is the latest thing to hit the fitness circle. Looks abit like break dancing and combat. Then we grooved to the beat from the Aseana Percussion Band. It was world class standard. And finally we laughed till our tummy ached with stand up singer/comedian Buddy Loren. He was really multi-talented, singing from Hokkien to Arabic songs, doing impersonations from Shah Rukh Khan to Michael Jackson....wow!

Finally we had the grand lucky draw where the grand prize was a 3day 2night ticket for two to Perth, Australia. I only managed to win the Ipod Shuffle....someone else got the Ipod Nano. But I'm happy enough...I was hoping to get a digital camera or an Ipod, and I got at least what I hoped for :) Other prizes given away were like Motorola Razor handphone, aircons, microwaves, pdas, etc. What an exciting time and we finally ended about 1am.

Looking forward to what's in store for next year...

So long...Farewell!!

2005-09-26T20:23:00.000-07:00

I went for my usual cardio dance last Saturday and started to miss my instructor already when he said it will be his last class next wednesday. Was very tempted to join the other gym so I actually went to check it out last Friday. It looks good so far but the next day, I kinda felt too lazy to travel all the way which roughly takes about an hour to get there. The other 3 members of his class were also contemplating about joining the other gym and asked what was the best package and days to go.

Later we decided to take some photos for memories and everyone was like modeling with each other. I think we laughed so much that we must have caused quite a ruckus cause the passerbys were kinda staring at us and wondering what was all the commotion about. He had to take a shower because he had another class later in another branch so we continued to "model" some more. When he finally came out again, he hanged around with us a little while more so we focused all our cameras on him instead. I think we kinda made him camera shy by now. Hey...models should love the camera right?

Finally he had to go but I casually mentioned that I think he will miss us when he leaves so he was wondering whether he can influence all to join him there.....yeah, that might be a possibility....So long and Farewell!!

Below are some captions which we took that day...

STOMPing Performance

2005-09-19T23:23:00.000-07:00

I went to the STOMP performance last Sunday and man, I was impressed. There were only 8 of them but they gave a really A-class performance without break for almost 2 hours. Talk about stamina...talk about body coordination...and the RHYTHM!!

My eyes were glued to the performance lest I blink and miss something I shouldn't. The performance was well....beyond words. I never thought I'd have so much fun watching and laughing at their antics as well. I've watched Fame, Cats, Saturday Night Fever, Riverdance but this is the first time I ever went to such kind of performance where the audience were asked to participate and interact with the performers. After watching the show, you'll never look at your household utensils the same way again...nor your body.

It was just absolutely amazing watching the guys coordinating their hands and feet during the body percussion item. There were also anticipation as we wonder what other items they were going to use next. It started off with broomsticks, then sand and sticks, empty water coolers, paperbags, sinks filled with water....which comically looked like someone peeing when they released the stopper to let the water leak out into the pail, dustbins and lids...just to name a few. They must have did a lot of experimentation and practice to get the tone and dynamics just right and make music out of it. Never in my life would I thought that the water cooler sounded so nice as a drum...haha!

I think the main BIG attraction was when they switched off all the lights and with lights attached on their heads, they climbed up the stage to their giant percussion set consisting from all sorts of scrap metal parts to fire extinguishers. They were hanging from the ceiling to enable them to move from each part to each part in time. It was like a giant percussion orchestra!

They ended with an interactive item, asking us to stand up so that we can follow them in clapping and stomping to the rhythm with them...or at least attempt to. It was great fun and we left wanting more. That's what a good performance should do!

Dancer or Model?

2005-09-18T20:16:00.000-07:00

Recently my cardio dance teacher at my gym was selected as the 10 finalists in a model search contest. A few of us from his class went to support him....Well...I'm not a clubbing person so finding the place was one thing and getting there was another.

Finally we managed to get there in one piece with plenty of time to spare. The registration was supposed to start at 8pm and the event by 9pm. We reached there about a little past 8pm and the place was already filling up quite fast. My teacher's partner was also there along with a few other of his "kaki". We looked for him backstage and had a few pictures taken with his "canggih" hairstyle...you know the ones where the hair stands on end like spikes, kinda look like you just came out of a horror movie scared stiff...hehe...Was very tempted to touch it to see if it's as hard as it looks...but then again, don't wanna mess up his hair right before the competition.

We stood near the stage so that we could get a better view. By 9.30pm the place was jam packed and still no sign of the event starting. Some of the girls were in their stilletto heels, and with only standing place, I don't envy how their feet must feel by now. Always being the practical one, I wore my sneakers...lucky choice. The event didn't start until about 10pm....the delay seems to be because the VIPs were late, as usual.

After the 2 hour wait for the event to start, Lina Teoh, our MC came out to present the contestants. When it was his turn to do the catwalk, we were cheering him on like nobody's business. He could hear us and I think we could see a hint of a smile as he struggled not to smile while on stage. Don't know what's this thing about models not supposed to smile...though I think his smile is one of the most charming thing about him. They did about two rounds of catwalk and that was it...kinda disappointing after that long wait. Finally the results...drumrolls please.....And the winner is....

....sorry, it wasn't him.

But he went home with a pair of cool shades and voucher. After the event we went out for a cuppa and they were talking about the prizes and plans in store for the winners. I was just wondering how it would have affected him if he did win. He will probably be very busy touring on shoots and making appearances in galas or events. Will he have time to teach dancing anymore? Either way, he's leaving for another gym because they offered him a deal he couldn't refuse. I've always enjoyed his classes and will miss him. His was the first class I joined when I first joined the gym and have been following most of his classes since then...which is about almost two years. Sigh if it wasn't so far away, I would probably have joined the other gym as well....

Oh well, life goes on...

Endau Rompin Trip

2005-09-14T00:17:00.000-07:00

Just came back from my company trip in Endau Rompin, Pahang recently and was pretty tired but enjoyed it tremendously. Being quite near the swamp and forest areas, our mobile network service reception wasn't very good. We had to go to certain areas before we could see the bars in our mobile...the most three bars!! But the best place to get clear reception was at the beach, one of my favourite places:-)

My colleagues and I actually woke up at 5am the first day to catch the sunrise at the beach. We waited there about 1 hour before we could glimpse some light coming up. Man, what a sight!! The sun was such a brilliant ball of fire coming out from the horizon! Intense man...if you are late, you will miss it because it was only for about 5 minutes and it was daylight.

We had some telematches later on in the day including tug of war. Let me say this, playing tug of war on the sand is really tough cos there's not much ground for you to anchor your feet. Sadly, my group lost...mainly because the group were unevenly grouped. Some had more male members than the rest.

We also had futsal on the beach after the telematches...running on the sand was another mean feat. Nearly twisted my ankles too. Our team didn't win but it was a good match. The funniest incident was when the Physical Resource Team which consisted of all guys who were experienced futsal players, dressed in their football jerseys and shoes played against an inexperienced team. Because of time constraint, if they can't score a goal to see who wins, they take their luck by playing "one two som"....and the PRD boys lost the futsal match because of "one two som"!!

We had a more relaxing time after that with walks on the beach and hawaiian theme dinner at the poolside...which came with a watergun fight after that!! Some even took the big plastic bags, filled them up with water from the pool and drenched their victims!! We also had the opportunity to see the A&W bear which another group of tourists invited for their event.

When we finally had to say our farewells, the hotel had a farewell dance for us as we went back for our 6 hour drive in the coaches. Finding a toilet on the way back was one of the main concern but eventually we arrived safe and happy. Till the next trip next year....here is a picture I took with my favourite bear.

For more captions, check it out at my photoblog:

Lifelogger.com

Take Sport. Add Music

2005-08-24T19:25:00.000-07:00

I’ve always liked the Nike ads and recently I’ve discovered they have these cool dance steps taught online on their website. They have different genres like Rockstar, Brasilian, and Salsa. I also liked the ones on Xtreme Step and Hip Hop Spin. There is quite a variety on different types of sports which you can find in the Cardio Cross Training and they even have one on sword wielding called Forza.

Pretty interesting website and I loved their wallpapers. They can be downloaded and I’ve inserted one here which is one my favourites.

What can I say….it speaks what’s in my heart. Music makes me want to move it, move it…;-)

Shall We Dance

2005-08-20T02:02:00.000-07:00

I still remember when I first saw the movie "Shall We Dance" and I fell in love with it. Watching the dancers dance with such grace and fluidity of movement made me just want to sigh. The most memorable scene was when Richard Gere, dressed in his tuxedo holding a red rose in his hand as he stood on the escalator to meet his wife. He looked so dashing and my knees went weak just looking at him. I still remember they played "The Book of Love" by Peter Gabriel as the background music.

Dancing and music is part and parcel of what I'm made of. I can still remember when I was very young I begged my mother to let me go for ballet classes but she kept giving excuses that it will deform my legs or that it's too expensive. Now that I am reaching my 30s, my passion for dance and music is still very much alive. Since joining a gym sometime in May 2004, the dancing classes have always been one of my favourite classes.

I still dream of finding a partner who is willing to learn how to dance so that we can do that together. Dancing is such a good way to improve your posture and body confidence. It is also a good way to bond with each other and it can also be so romantic....especially ballroom dancing. Hmmm....I 've always been a romantic at heart ;-) Guess this is the way God made females.

Who is the Lord of your Dance?

2005-07-31T22:56:00.000-07:00

This blog is about my ramblings of my life as a dance and Jesus as the Lord of my dance. Music and movement has always been one of my passions and that includes dancing. I liked the way my favourite singer, Steven Curtis Chapman puts it:

" I am the heart, He is the heartbeat,
I am the eyes, He is the sight,
I see clearly, I am just a body, He is the life.
I move my feet, I go through the motions
But He gives purpose to chance
I am the dancer, He is the Lord of the dance."

Everyone dances to the beat of a different drum but I want to dance to His drumbeats. Anyone care to join me in this dance of life?